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Thread: Neighbour Stretcher Mystery Affair

  1. #1
    chalice's Avatar ____________________
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    The intrigue began last Saturday night. It was cold and stormy. Fact.

    I had an itch which needed scratching and only my next door neighbour could provide the fingernails. I extracted him via the medium of phone and he came round to my house with the requisite ganja, having being torn from a party not too far away.

    We had a smoke and he related to me how his wife was completely orf er ead at said party, so he's better get back quick.

    /Cut to day

    The next morning we twitched the curtains while an ambulance hummed outside for about an hour. Eventually, the lady of the house was deposited in the back, much handling-with-care notwithstanding.

    I wonder what the fuck happened.

  2. Lounge   -   #2
    Mr JP Fugley's Avatar Frog Shoulder BT Rep: +4
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    She cut her left hand quite badly whilst making a sandwich, that's my guess.
    "there is nothing misogynistic about anything, stop trippin.
    i type this way because im black and from nyc chill son "

  3. Lounge   -   #3
    Snee's Avatar Error xɐʇuʎs BT Rep: +1
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    Alcohol poisoning, she fell over, or something else.

  4. Lounge   -   #4
    Mr. Mulder's Avatar pepper your angus BT Rep: +10BT Rep +10
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    i too will go with some sort of sandwich making mishap.

  5. Lounge   -   #5
    chalice's Avatar ____________________
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr JP Fugley View Post
    She cut her left hand quite badly whilst making a sandwich, that's my guess.
    Yep, it was a wrist stretcher. What will those boffins think of next.

    There were neck braces involved, shouting and amphetamines.

    It was quality.

    Street.

  6. Lounge   -   #6
    Mr JP Fugley's Avatar Frog Shoulder BT Rep: +4
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    Quote Originally Posted by chalice View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Mr JP Fugley View Post
    She cut her left hand quite badly whilst making a sandwich, that's my guess.
    Yep, it was a wrist stretcher. What will those boffins think of next.

    There were neck braces involved, shouting and amphetamines.

    It was quality.

    Street.
    Did you manage to get some of the amphet.
    "there is nothing misogynistic about anything, stop trippin.
    i type this way because im black and from nyc chill son "

  7. Lounge   -   #7
    chalice's Avatar ____________________
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr JP Fugley View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by chalice View Post

    Yep, it was a wrist stretcher. What will those boffins think of next.

    There were neck braces involved, shouting and amphetamines.

    It was quality.

    Street.
    Did you manage to get some of the amphet.
    Not my seen.

    However, she is a documented mentalist who I intend to recount in forthcoming annals.

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