Never Been So Depressed Before

[DanB]

hey ad,

i just wanted to let you know i know how you feel (well sort of) i've been suffering from bouts of depression since i got out of prison 18 months ago.

i've got (or did have) some of the best mates in the world who stuck by me through all my shit yet i have dropped them like hot cakes.

i dont live at home and hardly see my parents and little brothers anymore. all i do is go to work and then shut myself away in my flat, even when my pals come round to see me other flat mates i stay upstairs.

Why do i do this? Fuck knows why but i spoke to someone who told me that its all due to underlying guilt (wtf?) about letting people down.

i guess i'm rambling but what i'm trying to say is fucking chin up and have a smile, if we cant be happy with ourselves then what chance do we have?

i ditto lilmiss's suggestion, if you want someone to talk to then pm me or whatever.




Dan

[hobbes]

You need to go see a doctor immediately. It is apparent that your life has been "derailed" from its expected course and you plan on moping about until someone comes to put you back on track. You are waiting for some "event" to happen to you.

Lil miss is right, you need to be the one who steps out, nobody is going to come a knockin' to fix your life.

1. You need to let go of your girlfriend, trust me, you are secretly waiting for her to come back, no matter what protestations you make. You are in what we call the stall cycle. Everyone has done this!

2. If going out and getting laid were easy we would all be doing it nightly. Women can smell desperation on a man stronger than any cologne, and it makes them run. You should go out looking to have a good time and if a situation arises, flow with it. Going out with the expectation of getting laid can lead to further frustration. The truth is that picking women up in a bar is not something that most guys can do. Women are not really there to get laid, they would rather leave with you to go talk.

Combine this frustration with alcohol and you will spend the night crying to your friends about your girlfriend and calling all the women around you "bitches". Nothing good will come of this, and nobody will want to be around you.

I reserve drinking for celebration and not "drowning out" problems. Alcohol tends to heighten your emotions and sadness will become maudlin self pity.


3. You need to get a focus, a goal. Get in shape, train for a run, lose weight. Most of these activities will energize your body and your mind, and you will feel that you have accomplished something that day. The hardest part is that first step.

4. Sleeping too much without feeling rested, waking up early in the morning feeling guilty, lack of pleasure from things you had previously enjoyed, guilt, and apathy can be a sign that you have clinical depression. However, people with clinical depression generally will tell you they don't know why they are depressed, they just are. You have a very specific incident which triggered this.

Sounds to me like you are in a prolonged mourning phase and you need a jolt to get started.

So, right now, get dressed and go to the doctor. He can either help you by being someone to listen to your distress or he can prescribe medication to assist your recovery.

As for suicide, don't bullshit the doctor. If you had planned to do it, but without leaving a note or if your plans are specific and detailed, you need to talk to him about it. If you just you think it out of frustration or for attention, tell him you want some attention, not that you are thinking about suicide.

The trick is that if you start talking about suicide, the doctor has the authority to lock you up in a psychiatric ward for 72 hours, as you pose a danger to yourself. That is why I stress not to talk bullshit. I have seen friends locked up because they got drunk and spouted off at the mouth that they were "suicidal". Man did they regret that the next day, and day after.

That is why I am familiar with this topic.

Now git!!!

[balamm]

I've saved this for future reference hobbes. You've presented the facts better than most professionals I've known could have.