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Thread: Blonde Jokes Gotta Luvem

  1. #1
    a mother walks into her daughters room holding a condom i hope you havnt been sexualy active. the blonde daughter replys
    no i just lay there

  2. Funny S**t   -   #2
    why did god create blondes
    cause sheep cant get you a beer from the fridge

    santa the easter bunny the tooth fairy and a smat blonde where walking down the street and spot a hundred dollar bill

    which one got the bill

    no1 because all four dont existe and the dumb blont thought it was a gum wrapper

  3. Funny S**t   -   #3
    what do ya call a blonde that dies her hair bernett

    artificial inteligence

    what does a blonde say when you blow in her ear

    thanx for the refill

    There were three women, a Brunette, a Red Head, and a Blonde. They all worked together at an office.
    Every day they noticed that their boss left work a little early. So one day they met together and decided that today when the boss left, they would all leave early too.
    The boss left and so did they. The Brunette went home and straight to bed so could get an early start the next morning. The Red Head went home to get in a quick work out before her dinner date. The Blonde went home and walked into the bedroom. She opens the door slowly and saw her husband in bed with her boss, so she shut the door and left.
    The next day, the Brunette and the Red Head are talking about going home early again. They ask the Blonde if she wants to leave early again.
    "No," she says, "yesterday I nearly got caught!"

    do you know why the blonde got fired from the M&Ms factory

    for throuin gout the Ws

    whats the diffrence between a blonde an dyour job

    6 months later your job stll sucks

    A car was driving down the street when all of a sudden it started swerving. The car was going back and forth till someone with a cell phone called the police. A police officer pulled the car over. A blonde rolls down the window and says, " Officer, I'm so glad you are here. I saw a tree in the road, then I saw another. So I had to swerve to keep from hitting it!" The officer looks at her, then says, "Ma'am, that's your air freshener."

    whys it good to have a blonde in your passenger seat

    you can use hadicap parking

    A blonde was driving down the highway to Disneyland when she saw a sign that said "DISNEYLAND LEFT".
    After thinking for a minute, she said to herself "oh well !" and turned around an drove home.
    On her way home the same blonde drove past another sign that said "CLEAN
    By the time she drove eight miles, shehad cleaned 43 restrooms.

    : whats the first thing a blonde does in the morning


  4. Funny S**t   -   #4
    Mr. Mulder's Avatar pepper your angus BT Rep: +10BT Rep +10
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Vault 111
    Two blondes walk into a building'd think one of them would have seen it

    How do you know when a blondes been at a computer? ...when there's tipex on the screen

  5. Funny S**t   -   #5
    fkdup74's Avatar Pneuberator.
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    why dont blonds wear hoop earrings?

    cause their heels get stuck in em!
    I am just a worthless liar. I am just an imbecile.
    I will only complicate you. Trust in me and fall as well.
    I will find a center in you. I will chew it up and leave.
    I will work to elevate you just enough to bring you down.

  6. Funny S**t   -   #6
    Two blondes walk into a building'd think one of them would have seen it 

  7. Funny S**t   -   #7
    Try this
    A blonde and a brunette are walking along together and the brunette says "Look a dead bird!"
    The blond scans the sky and says "Where?"

  8. Funny S**t   -   #8
    a few more...

    Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman as
    opposed to a regular one?
    (You have to hollow out the head.)

    Why won't they hire blondes as pharmacists?
    (They keep breaking the prescription bottles in the

    Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio?
    It took her a month to realize she could play it in the

    What happened to the blonde ice hockey team?
    (They drowned during Spring Training.)

    Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence?
    (To see what was on the other side.)

    How did the blonde die drinking milk?
    (The cow stepped on her.)

    How did the blonde burn her nose?
    (Bobbing for French fries.)

    Why do blondes have more fun?
    (They're easier to amuse.)

    What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer?
    (Frosted flakes.)

    Why can't blondes put in light bulbs?
    (They keep breaking them with their hammers.)

    Did you hear about the blonde that shot an arrow into the
    (She missed.)

    What is it when a blonde blows into another blonde's ear?
    (Data transfer.)

    Why did the blonde resolve to have only three children?
    (Because she read that one child out of every four born
    was Chinese.)

    Why did the blonde put make-up on her forehead?
    (She wanted everyone to know that she was able to make
    up her mind.)

    Why did the blonde ask her friends to save their burned-out
    light bulbs?
    (She needed them for the darkroom she was building.)

    Why are Asians so smart?
    (No blondes.)

  9. Funny S**t   -   #9
    cpt_azad's Avatar Colonel
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Surrey, BC
    here's one:

    2 blondes are driving down the highway when they see a field of wheat. they spot boat in the field with a blonde in it rowing. the first blonde in the car says "It's blondes like this that give us a bad name", and the second blonde in the car replies "Ya! If I knew how to swim, I'd go and teach her a lesson!"

    Jeff Loomis: He's so good, he doesn't need to be dead to have a tribute.

  10. Funny S**t   -   #10
    a blind man walks in a bar, he asks the bartender for a beer and says to her, " hey ive got a great blonde joke to tell you." the bartender then speaks up and says " look mr. there's something you ought to know. im blonde and i own the bar, there are two other blondes in here aswell, ones a lawyer and the other is a female body builder, are you sure you want to tell that joke mr." he responds " no, i suppose i dont." the blonde body builder then speaks up and says, " great im glad you see it our way, cause i'd hate to have to hurt ya!" then the blonde lawyer says, "or sue ya!" and the bartender says, " or throw you out of my bar!" then the blind man says, " yes, well i'd hate to have to explain it to the three of you dummies after i told it!"

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