Arse!

[manker]

Three days!

If only oven off and on switches were gigantic, protruding red things that couldn't possibly be overlooked.

[Squeamous]

Three days!

If only oven off and on switches were gigantic, protruding red things that couldn't possibly be overlooked.

I don't think it was my fault. I think it was my ex when he came over and cleaned the kitchen for me. I blamed him for everything unexpected and disappointing when we were together and I don't see any reason to stop now.

[Biggles]

Hypothetically, let's say he does come over and fix it. Exactly what did you have in mind for a testing/verification procedure?

Well, it's a moot point now, because.....

You're so handy! Would you like to come over and help me fix my oven? This is not a euphemism. For obvious reasons it's not hot, so you can't possibly burn your fingers.

I'm glad it is not a euphemism 'cos I would be digging in the urban dictionary if it was

Generally an unhot oven has a either a blown fuse (usually 30 amp or similar and easy to fix) or the element is unhappy (not good). The other thing it could be is if the timer device is at the wrong setting.

You are now going to tell me it is a gas oven aren't you

Turns out that I'd accidentally just switched off the power at the wall while cleaning or something else. 3 days it was before I realised. I was just about to pull the damn thing out and take it apart when the cold realisation descended upon me that I'd been an utter fuckwit.

Asking if it was switched on did cross my mind but I have had hard Paddington Bear type stares for going down that route in the past

[Biggles]

Three days!

If only oven off and on switches were gigantic, protruding red things that couldn't possibly be overlooked.

I don't think it was my fault. I think it was my ex when he came over and cleaned the kitchen for me. I blamed him for everything unexpected and disappointing when we were together and I don't see any reason to stop now.

Consistency is a virtue or something else

[Squeamous]

Asking if it was switched on did cross my mind but I have had hard Paddington Bear type stares for going down that route in the past

You're a survivor, that much is obvious x

[Squeamous]

I don't think it was my fault. I think it was my ex when he came over and cleaned the kitchen for me. I blamed him for everything unexpected and disappointing when we were together and I don't see any reason to stop now.

Consistency is a virtue or something else

You know where you stand with me. In the corner with a dunce's hat on.

[Biggles]

Asking if it was switched on did cross my mind but I have had hard Paddington Bear type stares for going down that route in the past

You're a survivor, that much is obvious x

Tiny incremental learning steps. Tiny painful incremental steps.

[manker]

I'll be the one to raise an incredulous eyebrow.
'my ex came over to clean the kitchen'

what the fucking fuck

So anyway, you're single now, eh. Is there anyone special on the horizon or are you not planning to completely emasculate anyone for a short while

[Alien5]

I don't own a motorcar, but I have previously owned a vast array of bicycles which unluckily for me often resulted in unexpected punctures of the tyre inner-tube.

Arse

[Squeamous]

Tiny incremental learning steps. Tiny painful incremental steps.

I'll be the one to raise an incredulous eyebrow.
'my ex came over to clean the kitchen'

what the fucking fuck

So anyway, you're single now, eh. Is there anyone special on the horizon or are you not planning to completely emasculate anyone for a short while

Well I exaggerate: I cooked dinner he washed up, but it's better if I tell it the other way

At the moment I've got my hands full with my job and the mortgage. I simply haven't got any room in my hands for mens' balls; not as a permanent fixture anyway. I wouldn't rule it out though.....I've got my eye on a couple, with a possible view to a third pair.