Dave's blog

[Squeamous]

So basically; Dave's hierarchy of rock hardness looks like this:

1. chavois
2. Squeams
3. Me
4. Dave

I've put chavois at the top because whereas he just had to arm himself to be safe from the massive and real threat posed by a girl and her accountant, he actually moved house to escape the Great Irish Threat

[manker]

So basically; Dave's hierarchy of rock hardness looks like this:

1. chavois
2. Squeams
3. Me
4. Dave

I've put chavois at the top because whereas he just had to arm himself to be safe from the massive and real threat posed by a girl and her accountant, he actually moved house to escape the Great Irish Threat

When it turns out it was the Great Welsh Threat all the time

I'm the rapier ying to chavois' semtex yang.

[Squeamous]

I've taken steps. And measures. I've had to, MagnumMachete has left me with no choice. I've informed all my other spastics and stalkers that there's a spastic stalker after me, and if they deal with the problem first prize is me slathered with Jam on the fourth plinth in Trafalgar Square. I'll be moving to a safe house somewhere and putting a decoy on said plinth. I expect when I return to find all 5+ spastics in a bloody mess/public art installation.

[chalice]

When it turns out it was the Great Welsh Threat all the time

I'm the rapier ying to chavois' semtex yang.

I've got a baseball bat made out of semtex.

[Artemis]

I'm the rapier ying to chavois' semtex yang.

I've got a baseball bat made out of semtex.

Errr.... wouldn't that be quite droopy?

[chalice]

I've got a baseball bat made out of semtex.

Errr.... wouldn't that be quite droopy?

Only after it spends its payload.

[Proper Bo]

In years to come while Magnum's doing a long stretch either inside or on a secure unit, I'm sure some film producery types would be interested in making his batshit mental saga into a film.
"Magnum Dave: Balustrades of Blood" would be the title I'd go with, like.

[Artemis]

Errr.... wouldn't that be quite droopy?

Only after it spends its payload.

*Sigh, Semtex is maleable i.e. not terribly rigid, so by the time you form it into a four foot bat that is thicker at one end than the other it will tend to droop. The explosive itself does not poessess the rigidity to be a bat all by itself, unless you froze it. But then it wouldn't go bang. Well it wouldn't go bang until it defrosted and got all droopy again in about 12-16 hours depending on the time of year/how much sun you don't have that day.

[manker]

I've taken steps. And measures. I've had to, MagnumMachete has left me with no choice. I've informed all my other spastics and stalkers that there's a spastic stalker after me, and if they deal with the problem first prize is me slathered with Jam on the fourth plinth in Trafalgar Square. I'll be moving to a safe house somewhere and putting a decoy on said plinth. I expect when I return to find all 5+ spastics in a bloody mess/public art installation.

I wonder if all of the stalkers will be armed as thoroughly as Dave will be.
Six or eight spastics, covered with grenades and throwing stars and napalm nozzles, trying to jostle for position on a plinth.

Knowing Trafalgar Square as I do, it would be a terrific danger to the wildfowl.
I imagine Idol would hear of the pigeon plight, skateboard in, coral the spastics and then ignite them with an intense glare of pure derision.

[manker]

ITT: Arty teaches a Northern Irishman about semtex.