Enema: Friend or Foe?

[shaina]

Before anyone takes offense, I went to a doctor and he said I can't be blamed for the things I say because the CT scan found that my mouth isn't properly connected to my brain.

And being free in Canada, it took you a year and a half to get the scan and four months to get the results

That was a very long time people you had to suffer

PS. And whatever they tried to correct the problem is still not working

But it is fine with me

[manker]

Is this fecking mumsnet.

Any person who sticks fingers up his ham flower before taking an oral laxative is a big ghey.

I avoid ingesting OTCs and prescriptions alike until I can at least do some light research on them, especially after that time I had been accidentally taking an antidepressant for a month.

My short white list includes bismuth subsalicylate and naproxen. I'd be willing to add a laxative if I could figure out what the fuck is written on any of the boxes.

I mean, you pick up a package, of anything, and the entire thing is covered in writing. You don't even know where to start because the formatting is no fucking help.

You've were talking about moving to Japan 4 years ago, did it at no point since then occur that a fey parlance in the local dialect might be of use at some point.

Anyway, no matter.
Google have introduced this fantastic new application, I'm happy to tell you that it could well help you in this case and many others. It's really rather popular.



Save it, it's all yours my friend

[megabyteme]

He's in Japan.

Mary,

Go to the cheapest, least clean sushi joint you can find. Doubtful you will be able to hold in the anal volcano that will follow while cycling back to your apartment.

Have a truly shitty day,

Meg

P.S. As an American providing this emergency medical service, I am required by law to charge you $2789547890. This number was created by mashing my fingers on the number row. That is how it is done here.

[mjmacky]

You've were talking about moving to Japan 4 years ago, did it at no point since then occur that a fey parlance in the local dialect might be of use at some point.

I was too busy talking about going to Japan to have time to study Japanese. Actually, I had put off attempts to study it until I was certain I'd be able to go. I crammed the phonetic alphabets, some grammar, and some words and phrases the months leading to my departure. Despite that, I pretty much landed with a blank slate because learning without implementation is fleeting.

After getting here, I was enthused at the ability for the Google translate app to be able to translate Japanese audio input and even pictures of all the Kanji. In practice though, it's way too cumbersome to rely on because you'd spend like over an hour in the store just taking pictures trying to find out which bento boxes have icky stuff. You'd have to experience it to truly understand how impractical it becomes. Compound that with limited free time. It's still great for small stuff though. I've taken the buy-by-sight and go-with-the-flow approaches to speed things along.

I learn at home and go out to practice, and even though I can speak, read, and write some, I completely shut down when I'm getting replies and followups at full speed or when I'm hammered with too much text. I also work really slow when I can't smoke while reading and writing, so that's been causing an issue. It's been a little discouraging, but I'm looking forward to quitting my American job to get a work visa and any job over here so that I can escape the state of limbo with respect to how long I can stay here.

[mjmacky]

There's also a couple of issues with that translation

[mjmacky]

Something like this makes more sense


All moot though because I really don't want to start taking laxatives. I have enough problems with my GI tract as it is, so I refuse to consider welcoming other complications. I'd even give the ol' dildo another whirl before considering that, no homo.

[manker]

You're very American in your wanton over-complication of a simple health issue.
The tone in this thread is almost celebratory.

Still, no pics - and for that I can be grateful.

[mjmacky]

You're very American in your wanton over-complication of a simple health issue.
The tone in this thread is almost celebratory.

Still, no pics - and for that I can be grateful.

I overcomplicate much more than that. It's pretty much my raison d'etre.

[mjmacky]

You're just rediscovering things you had previously known. This is what your absence has wrought.

[manker]

This is true, I'd better level up.

Recommence your frantic finger frottage.