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Thread: Last one to post wins the internets

  1. #481
    JPaul's Avatar Fat Secret Agent
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    I have extended my hatred of the question mark to the comma, that is a done deal.

    I am still not decided on the apostrophe. Pretty sure the possessive one is getting it, but the contraction may still survive t'purge.

  2. Lounge   -   #482
    manker's Avatar effendi
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    Eldest manklet phoned me up today at half two; 'Dad, we've got a game in an hour'. I told him that I had appointments and that I wouldn't be able to make it. He replied with; 'But it's Senghenydd, we hate them'. You'll appreciate I had little choice when faced with such eloquent reasoning. I spent the next 45 minutes lying to clients and loading yet more work onto the already overly-taxed hawt burds. I was still going to be late as Senhenydd is at the arse end of nowhere, traffic was being a twat, and by the time I got my wellies on the half time whistle was sounding as I approached the field. Still, not bad, I thought.

    I then noticed his not insubstantial frame loping over to me. 'Where have you been? Cracking first half, two fights and we're 19-5 up.' Enthused by his enthusiasm, I set in for the second half, which looked to be starting imminently - only he was still standing next to me. I enquired about this and he informed me that they've got this system where forwards can't play more than 100 minutes in a week, so he was being rested for the second half as they've got a cup game on Thursday. It had been pre-arranged, apparently.

    I plan on beating him to death with his kids. I'll use them as a bludgeon on his face. -

    --Good for them if they survive.

  3. Lounge   -   #483
    manker's Avatar effendi
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    Quote Originally Posted by JPaul View Post
    I have extended my hatred of the question mark to the comma, that is a done deal.

    I am still not decided on the apostrophe. Pretty sure the possessive one is getting it, but the contraction may still survive t'purge.
    Do you extend that odd curly wurly aversion quirk to text messages and work related correspondence?
    I'm now wondering whether your odd chatting aversion quirk extends to abstinence from both these activities anyhow to render my enquiry moot
    I plan on beating him to death with his kids. I'll use them as a bludgeon on his face. -

    --Good for them if they survive.

  4. Lounge   -   #484
    Biggles's Avatar Looking for loopholes
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    This may be worth watching if one has access

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b083s663
    Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum


  5. Lounge   -   #485
    megabyteme's Avatar RASPBERRY RIPPLE BT Rep: +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19
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    Quote Originally Posted by manker View Post
    [...] You'll appreciate I had little choice when faced with such eloquent reasoning. I spent the next 45 minutes lying to clients and loading yet more work onto the already overly-taxed hawt burds. [...]
    You did the right thing. That is how you dad properly.
    Quote Originally Posted by IdolEyes787 View Post
    Ghey lumberjacks, wolverines, blackflies in the summer, polar bears in the winter, that's basically Canada in a nutshell.

  6. Lounge   -   #486
    JPaul's Avatar Fat Secret Agent
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    Quote Originally Posted by manker View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by JPaul View Post
    I have extended my hatred of the question mark to the comma, that is a done deal.

    I am still not decided on the apostrophe. Pretty sure the possessive one is getting it, but the contraction may still survive t'purge.
    Do you extend that odd curly wurly aversion quirk to text messages and work related correspondence?
    I'm now wondering whether your odd chatting aversion quirk extends to abstinence from both these activities anyhow to render my enquiry moot
    I never use the curly wurly, including text messages and official correspondence. Which is quite bizarre as I also eschew any of the puerile text speak. Though why I would do that in official correspondence is a mystery.

    I will go to great lengths not to ask questions in fairly serious missives so as to avoid having to use them.

    Though to be honest a reasonably worded question doesn't really require the curly wurly anyway, wouldn't you agree.

    It is obvious when someone is asking a question, why would I rub their nose in it.

  7. Lounge   -   #487
    JPaul's Avatar Fat Secret Agent
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    Quote Originally Posted by manker View Post
    Eldest manklet phoned me up today at half two; 'Dad, we've got a game in an hour'. I told him that I had appointments and that I wouldn't be able to make it. He replied with; 'But it's Senghenydd, we hate them'. You'll appreciate I had little choice when faced with such eloquent reasoning. I spent the next 45 minutes lying to clients and loading yet more work onto the already overly-taxed hawt burds. I was still going to be late as Senhenydd is at the arse end of nowhere, traffic was being a twat, and by the time I got my wellies on the half time whistle was sounding as I approached the field. Still, not bad, I thought.

    I then noticed his not insubstantial frame loping over to me. 'Where have you been? Cracking first half, two fights and we're 19-5 up.' Enthused by his enthusiasm, I set in for the second half, which looked to be starting imminently - only he was still standing next to me. I enquired about this and he informed me that they've got this system where forwards can't play more than 100 minutes in a week, so he was being rested for the second half as they've got a cup game on Thursday. It had been pre-arranged, apparently.

    May favourite bit was when he wasn't playing in the second half.

    I take it he's like 12 if they are only aloud limited fight time in any given week.

  8. Lounge   -   #488
    manker's Avatar effendi
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    Quote Originally Posted by megabyteme View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by manker View Post
    [...] You'll appreciate I had little choice when faced with such eloquent reasoning. I spent the next 45 minutes lying to clients and loading yet more work onto the already overly-taxed hawt burds. [...]
    You did the right thing. That is how you dad properly.
    It's decent of you to say so. However, there's always a yang.
    It was good for that kid, but then I was late home from work and only saw the others for half an hour before their bed-time. It was okay with them though because I brought a tiny action figure and a teddy with me. The missus wasn't best impressed but hey ho.

    The dad part of being a dad who works 50+ hours a week is really easy. It's a couple of hours a day doing stuff you really like doing anyway.
    Being a mam is the hard thing, that's why I've got so much respect for you and JP.
    I plan on beating him to death with his kids. I'll use them as a bludgeon on his face. -

    --Good for them if they survive.

  9. Lounge   -   #489
    manker's Avatar effendi
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    Quote Originally Posted by JPaul View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by manker View Post
    Do you extend that odd curly wurly aversion quirk to text messages and work related correspondence?
    I'm now wondering whether your odd chatting aversion quirk extends to abstinence from both these activities anyhow to render my enquiry moot
    I never use the curly wurly, including text messages and official correspondence. Which is quite bizarre as I also eschew any of the puerile text speak. Though why I would do that in official correspondence is a mystery.

    I will go to great lengths not to ask questions in fairly serious missives so as to avoid having to use them.

    Though to be honest a reasonably worded question doesn't really require the curly wurly anyway, wouldn't you agree.

    It is obvious when someone is asking a question, why would I rub their nose in it.
    I share a little of your disdain for the question mark.
    It can work for you, though. I use it very sparingly, to elicit a specific response. Almost conditioning an unsuspecting reader. Yes, that makes me sound like a tit but people often don't cotton on.

    If I'm being srs bznz, then I'll dress actual queries as rhetoric and eschew the technically correct punctuation altogether as you do, as if there is only one possible answer (an answer I favour). I'll prod the reader by alluding to that answer a little later in the piece.
    Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Either way, it puts my narrative in a slightly more authoritative light.
    If I'm more confident about the query, I'll append a curly wurly to it so that the respondent reaffirms my belief in the reply, yet wonders if he or she has won a small battle by doing so.
    This seemingly insignificant gesture often leads to greater concessions further down the line. A small part of the dance which I enjoy in its entirety.

    The downside to all this is that I spend longer on words, which I don't charge for, than I do for the numbers
    I plan on beating him to death with his kids. I'll use them as a bludgeon on his face. -

    --Good for them if they survive.

  10. Lounge   -   #490
    manker's Avatar effendi
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    Quote Originally Posted by JPaul View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by manker View Post
    Eldest manklet phoned me up today at half two; 'Dad, we've got a game in an hour'. I told him that I had appointments and that I wouldn't be able to make it. He replied with; 'But it's Senghenydd, we hate them'. You'll appreciate I had little choice when faced with such eloquent reasoning. I spent the next 45 minutes lying to clients and loading yet more work onto the already overly-taxed hawt burds. I was still going to be late as Senhenydd is at the arse end of nowhere, traffic was being a twat, and by the time I got my wellies on the half time whistle was sounding as I approached the field. Still, not bad, I thought.

    I then noticed his not insubstantial frame loping over to me. 'Where have you been? Cracking first half, two fights and we're 19-5 up.' Enthused by his enthusiasm, I set in for the second half, which looked to be starting imminently - only he was still standing next to me. I enquired about this and he informed me that they've got this system where forwards can't play more than 100 minutes in a week, so he was being rested for the second half as they've got a cup game on Thursday. It had been pre-arranged, apparently.

    May favourite bit was when he wasn't playing in the second half.

    I take it he's like 12 if they are only aloud limited fight time in any given week.
    Yep, 12. I think they're allowed to legally beat the shit out of each other for as long as they want when they're 15.
    I could be wrong, though, I had to give up rugby at an early juncture owing to being shite at fighting.

    Curiously, that disability didn't hold me back in the slightest with footie.
    I plan on beating him to death with his kids. I'll use them as a bludgeon on his face. -

    --Good for them if they survive.

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