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Thread: Talking Openly In A Way That Does Not Hurt?

  1. #1
    internet.news
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    What is about telling what you think openly to another Person, but telling it in a way that does not hurt the other person so much? I think there are many such ituations, in which you want to talk openly about an issue but you do not want to hurt other person?

  2. Lounge   -   #2
    Yogi's Avatar Super Undulator
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    Sweet Dreams!!!

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  3. Lounge   -   #3
    muchspl2
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    meh
    just tell the truth, this is the interweb

  4. Lounge   -   #4
    SniperInTheShadows's Avatar Poster
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    I believe it stem's from fear and compassion (in some peep's cases) -

    1. We fear what other peep's will think of us if we say something that they don't want to hear, so we try to make it sound like we're on their side and sugar coat things.

    2. We fear that someone will tell us something that we don't want to hear so we sugar coat thing's in the hopes that others will know that we tried not to hurt them before and they'll try to do the same for us.

    3. Compassion. When we care for someone we don't want to hurt them yet we do want to help them or tell them something that we believe they need to hear, so we try to make it less painful for them in the hope of helping them out.

    - I don't like telling peep's thing's that need to be said sometimes and I usualy just keep my gob shut but when I do tell peep's thing's that need to be said I try to let them know that I do understand their side (if the instance is an arguement or something similair) and am only trying to help. Very rarely will I actualy be blunt and tell them without trying to be compassionate, the only times I tend to do that are when there's been problem's for a while and nothing else has gotten through to them.

    Sniper. (Telling you, politely and not wanting to hurt your feelings, this threads silly lol Only joking there, it's a good thread really dude!! )

  5. Lounge   -   #5
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    Originally posted by SniperInTheShadows@4 December 2003 - 14:46
    I believe it stem's from fear and compassion (in some peep's cases) -

    1. We fear what other peep's will think of us if we say something that they don't want to hear, so we try to make it sound like we're on their side and sugar coat things.

    2. We fear that someone will tell us something that we don't want to hear so we sugar coat thing's in the hopes that others will know that we tried not to hurt them before and they'll try to do the same for us.

    3. Compassion. When we care for someone we don't want to hurt them yet we do want to help them or tell them something that we believe they need to hear, so we try to make it less painful for them in the hope of helping them out.

    - I don't like telling peep's thing's that need to be said sometimes and I usualy just keep my gob shut but when I do tell peep's thing's that need to be said I try to let them know that I do understand their side (if the instance is an arguement or something similair) and am only trying to help. Very rarely will I actualy be blunt and tell them without trying to be compassionate, the only times I tend to do that are when there's been problem's for a while and nothing else has gotten through to them.

    Sniper. (Telling you, politely and not wanting to hurt your feelings, this threads silly lol Only joking there, it's a good thread really dude!! )
    Yep, I that is what I mean - if someone is an asshole, you can tell him directly opened or you can tell him truth in way that he know but which is not so hurting for his mind person

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    SniperInTheShadows's Avatar Poster
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    That is Enya in your sig isn't it .news!? I asked before but you didn't say and it's driving me mad as i'm sure it's her but the pic's a little to small to be 100% positive lol

    As for the Q you asked, even if the person's an asshole it's worth trying to tell them something in a way that's not going to be hurtfull or blunt (especially if they've got a really bad temper and are likely to kick your ass if you try telling them any other way lol)

    Sniper.

  7. Lounge   -   #7
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    Originally posted by SniperInTheShadows@4 December 2003 - 17:56
    That is Enya in your sig isn't it .news!? I asked before but you didn't say and it's driving me mad as i'm sure it's her but the pic's a little to small to be 100% positive lol

    As for the Q you asked, even if the person's an asshole it's worth trying to tell them something in a way that's not going to be hurtfull or blunt (especially if they've got a really bad temper and are likely to kick your ass if you try telling them any other way lol)

    Sniper.
    To answer you question, it is not Enya, it is actress that acts as Monica in
    "Touched by an Angel" ... I think her surename is Roma

    - to your last answered question: mainly if the person is your boss and
    you do not wanna lo´se a good payed job

  8. Lounge   -   #8
    Chame1eon's Avatar Super Freak
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    Originally posted by SniperInTheShadows@4 December 2003 - 08:46
    I believe it stem's from fear and compassion (in some peep's cases) -

    1. We fear what other peep's will think of us if we say something that they don't want to hear, so we try to make it sound like we're on their side and sugar coat things.

    2. We fear that someone will tell us something that we don't want to hear so we sugar coat thing's in the hopes that others will know that we tried not to hurt them before and they'll try to do the same for us.

    3. Compassion. When we care for someone we don't want to hurt them yet we do want to help them or tell them something that we believe they need to hear, so we try to make it less painful for them in the hope of helping them out.

    - I don't like telling peep's thing's that need to be said sometimes and I usualy just keep my gob shut but when I do tell peep's thing's that need to be said I try to let them know that I do understand their side (if the instance is an arguement or something similair) and am only trying to help. Very rarely will I actualy be blunt and tell them without trying to be compassionate, the only times I tend to do that are when there's been problem's for a while and nothing else has gotten through to them.

    Sniper. (Telling you, politely and not wanting to hurt your feelings, this threads silly lol Only joking there, it's a good thread really dude!! )
    Are people really afraid of knowing ohters opinions. IMO i would rather knw what people think and what I am missing. It's definatley better to know! maybe it's nice to avoid being rude or intentionally or pointlessly hurtfull, but when your just sugar coating your warping the truth and people know it.
    Well anyway i thing tht people mainly do it to aviod uncomfrotable situations or fights, but iwonder what would happen if people stopped. I wonder if we would become more desensitied and better able to handle the truth without getting defensive or feeling bad. Knowlledge opinions and constructive critisicsm could flow more freely!, and people could become more acepting of there flaws
    I only licked you for the salt

  9. Lounge   -   #9
    kicker of elves
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    We faih' whut otha' sucka's will think o' us if we say sump'n dat they duzn't
    wanna haih', so's we try t' make it sound likes we be on deir side an' sugah'
    coat shit.

    We faih' dat somecat will tell us sump'n dat we duzn't wanna haih' so's we
    sugah' coat shit in da hopes dat otha's will know dat we tried not t' hurt them
    b4 an' they gonna try t' do da same 4 us.

    When we care 4 somecat we duzn't wanna hurt them yet we do wanna help them o'
    tell them sump'n dat we recon' they need t' haih', so's we try t' make it less
    painful 4 them in da hope o' helpin' them out.

    I duzn't likes tellin' sucka's shit dat need t' be said sometimes an' I
    usua-like plum keep mah mout' shut but when I do tell sucka's shit dat need t'
    be said I try t' let them know dat I do dig deir side an' be only tryin' t'
    help. Real damn rare-like will I actua-like be blunt an' tell them without
    tryin' t' be compassionate, da only times I tend t' do dat be when dair has
    been bugs-up-da-ass 4 some while an' nothin' else has gotten through t' them.

  10. Lounge   -   #10
    Mr. Mulder's Avatar pepper your angus BT Rep: +10BT Rep +10
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