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Thread: Software Vs Hardware

  1. #1
    Lick My Lovepump
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    Software VS Hardware

    MICROSOFT SHOULD MAKE CARS, GM SHOULD MAKE SOFTWARE.
    At a recent computer expo, Bill Gates reportedly compared
    the computer industry with the auto industry and stated:

    "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry
    has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got
    1000 miles to the gallon."

    In response to Bill's comments/General Motors issued a press
    release stating the following: "If GM had developed technology
    like Microsoft, we would be driving cars with the following
    characteristics:

    1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a
    day.

    2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you would
    have to buy a new car.

    3. Occasionally, your car would die on the freeway for no
    reason, and you would accept this, restart, and drive on.

    4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn
    would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart;
    in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

    5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you
    bought 'Car95' or 'CarNT.' Then you would have to buy
    more seats.

    6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun,
    was more reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy
    to drive, but would only run on five percent of the roads.

    7. The oil, water, temperature and alternator warning lights
    would be replaced by a single 'general car fault' warning
    light.

    8. New seats would force everyone to have the same butt
    size.

    9. The airbag system would say 'Are you sure?' before going
    off.

    10. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would
    lock you out and refuse to let you in until you
    simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and
    grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

    11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a
    deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary),
    even though they neither need them nor want them. Attempting
    to delete this option would immediately cause the car's
    performance to diminish by 50 per cent or more.

    12. Every time GM introduced a new model, car buyers would
    have to learn how to drive all over again because none of
    the controls would operate in the same manner as the old
    car.

    13. You'd press the 'Start' button to shut off the engine.



    I just thought this was funny and I should share it. Its sort of hardware related and I don't think any of the people from other parts of the forum would appreciate it like you guys.

  2. Funny S**t   -   #2
    <span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'>BLAH</span>

    <span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'>Wayne Rooney - A thug and a thief</span>

  3. Funny S**t   -   #3
    Lick My Lovepump
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    Wow, has this forum died or something?

    Laugh people, laugh&#33;&#33;&#33;

  4. Funny S**t   -   #4
    BANNED
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    lol..... is this true?

  5. Funny S**t   -   #5
    Lick My Lovepump
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    It looks like it is

    You shoulda been at Comdex then you woulda known

  6. Funny S**t   -   #6
    Lick My Lovepump
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    This is fun too. Pretty old but.. if you were alive back then
    If Operating Systems were airlines


    IF OPERATING SYSTEMS RAN THE AIRLINES....

    UNIX Airways

    Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the
    airport. They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece
    by piece, arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed to
    be building.

    Air DOS

    Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and let
    the plane coast until it hits the ground again. Then they push again, jump
    on again, and so on ...

    Mac Airlines

    All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look and
    act exactly the same. Every time you ask questions about details, you are
    gently but firmly told that you don&#39;t need to know, don&#39;t want to know,
    and everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so
    just shut up.

    Windows Air

    The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy baggage
    check and boarding, and a smooth take-off. After about 10 minutes in the
    air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.

    Windows NT Air

    Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and takes
    out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it explodes.

    Linux Air

    Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start their
    own airline. They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave the runways
    themselves. They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing the
    ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself. When you
    board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a copy of
    the seat-HOWTO.html. Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is very
    comfortable, the plane leaves and arrives on time without a single problem,
    the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to tell customers of the other
    airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is, "You had to do
    what with the seat?"

  7. Funny S**t   -   #7
    Spicker's Avatar AKA jaigandhi5 BT Rep: +7BT Rep +7
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    this is soo old LOL

    but still funny&#33;

    My Blog
    I'm still here.

  8. Funny S**t   -   #8
    Autumn Fox's Avatar n00b
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    Originally posted by Mad Cat@3 January 2004 - 16:16
    (...)
    13. You&#39;d press the &#39;Start&#39; button to shut off the engine.
    (...)

  9. Funny S**t   -   #9
    Robert00000's Avatar Interweb Fantasist BT Rep: +1
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    this stuff is good, i was in stitches
    Robert00000

  10. Funny S**t   -   #10
    99shassan's Avatar Poster BT Rep: +1
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    lol
    Changed SPAN settings in sig a YEAR after it was removed

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