Funniest Simpsons Stuff

[cpt_azad]

when he gets that tennis court and kent brockman is playing and homer asks him how he comes up with such "witty remarks" and the guy in the van tells kent "i guess you can say it's my raquette" but the transmission got cut off so kent says "i guess you can say i'm iraqi" and then homer makes that noise and says "get out" i laughed for 10 minutes there are just too many funny scenes in the simpsons, but the newer episodes just plain suck. i find family guy funnier. but simpsons has it's moments (a lot of moments)

[cpt_azad]

Originally posted by Nightwolf@18 March 2004 - 00:31
Funniest Lines: Anything from Professor Frink or Ralph Wiggum

Funniest Song: Theme from "The Tomfoolery of Professor Frink"


Listen here...

http://www.u.arizona.edu/~mbstepp/sounds.html

professor frink is my favorite character in the simpsons (even though he doesn't get to much to say which kind of makes his appearances that much better). the tom foolery was hilarious "that monkey's gonna pay!" lol and the one where he invents the killer "novelty weasel">>"oh no, it's out of it's matrix!! we're all doomed! homer: why it's just a cute little weasel, aren't you mr.weasel? ahhhhhhhhhhhh!" freakin hilarious

[Haz]

I love this one.

Homer: Yeah Moe, that team sure did suck last night. They just plain sucked. I 've seen Teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.
Marge: Homer, watch your mouth.
Homer: I gotta go, my weiner kids are listening.

[tesco]

frink is the best character!

here i a good quote:

frink: when the burgler trips the alarm the house will raise from it's foundation and run down the street, around the corner to safety!
*house catches on fire*
Frink: well, the real ones wont burn quiet so fast, and ther....mahiven liven.

i love the whole, hiven liven thing!

[cpt_azad]

i love the whole, hiven liven thing! [/QUOTE]

  i love the whole, hiven liven thing! 

hell ya !!!

frink: marge simpson? i worked on a top secret project called operation HOIVEN MAVING!!!!!!!!

marge: professor frink?

frink: ah crap, how'd you know? out of curiosity, was it the hoiven or the moiving or the whole gahoivy thing that i do now that was fuckin hilarious!!

[DarthInsinuate]

Originally posted by ROSSCO_2004@19 March 2004 - 04:24
i love the whole, hiven liven thing!

don't forget 'gloiven'

[Samurai]

My favourite has to be 'Homer the Great' AKA 'The Stonecutters' episode...

Marge: "You are a member of a very exclusive club."
Homer: "The Black Panthers?"

Here is the Sacred oath:
"...And by the Sacred Parchment, I swear that if I reveal the secrets of the StoneCutters, may my stomach become bloated and my head be plucked of all but three hairs."

Members of the Stonecutters
#1 - Number One
#12 - Lenny
#14 - Carl
#29 - Charles Montgomery Burns
#38 - Abe
#57 - Dewey Largo
#62 - Seymour Skinner
#86 - Julius Hibbert
#124 - Herman
#156 - Chief Wiggum
#194 - Moe the Bartender
#242 - Hershel Krustofski
#259 - Scott Christian
#287 - Sideshow Mel
#362 - Mr. Van Houten
#384 - Waylon Smithers
#434 - Kent Brockman
#456 - Joe Quimby
#476 - Asst. Superintendent Leopold
#530 - Groundskeeper Willy
#589 - Steve Guttenberg
#632 - Jasper
#666 - Adolf Hitler
#712 - Barney
#747 - Apu
#793 - Lionel Hutz
#823 - Homer Glumplich
#846 - (some green alien)
#893 - (the Egg Council guy)
#908 - Homer Simpson

Stonecutter World Counsel:
Orville Redenbacher
Jack Nicholson
Lawrence Tero (Mr. T)
George Bush

THE FIVE RITUALS YOU MUST PASS TO BE A STONECUTTER:
Ritual #1 - All Stonecutters must take a Leap of Faith. If you survive this five-story plunge, your character will be proven.
Ritual #2 - The Crossing of the Desert.
Ritual #3 - The Unblinking Eye.
Ritual #4 - Wreck of the Hesperus.
Ritual #5 - The Paddling of the Swollen Ass, with paddles

Who controls the British crown?
Who keeps the metric system down?
We do! We do!
Who leaves Atlantis off the maps?
Who keeps the martians under wraps?
We do! We do!
Who holds back the electric car?
Who makes Steve Guttenberg a star?
We do! We do!
Who robs the cave fish of their sight?
Who rigs every Oscars night?
We do! We do!

[bujub22]

homer -i have seen the light and it burns!!  

homer-women like what i tell them to like !


[QUOTE]lisa-ever since he seen willy wonka and the choclate factory
he 's been looking for it ever so ...it consumes him!

[Blade025]

lol the prank phone calls by bart are also pretty funny...

Moe:
1. phone call for Al...Al coholic
2. ..ehh...Jacque Strap
3. Is I.P Freely Here?
4. hey is there a Butts here?...Seymour Butts
5. Homer Sexual
6. Amanda hugankiss
7. Hugh Jazz
8. Ivana Tinkle
9. I'm a stupid moron with a ugly face and a big butt and my butt smells and i like to kiss my own butt...( )
moe: LISTEN YOU!! when i catch you i'm going to pull out your eye and shove them down your pants so you watch me beat the crap out of you...

one by homer:

Homer:Moe i need your help...i got a friend named...Joey jo jo jr. shabado
Moe: Thats the worst name i've ever heard
(some guy runs out crying)
Barney: HEY! JOEY JO JO!!!

another by moe:

FBIo u you have a grude against mr.burns?
(strapped to a lie detector)
Moe: NO!
(bzzzzz)
Moe: Alright i do! but i didn't shoot him!
(ding)
FBI:Your free to go then..
Moe:good cause i have a hot date!
(bzzz)
Moe:a date
(bzzzz)
Moe: dinner with friend
(bzzz)
Moe:dinner alone
(bzzz)
Moe:ALRIGHT!! i'm going to sit at home and look at the girls in the victoria secrets catalogue..
(bzzz)
Moe: ......sears catalogue
(ding)

one by wiggum:

wiggum: ok folks, shows over nothing to see here, shows O MY GOD!!! a horrible plane crash, hey everybody look at this crash, come on don't be shy.

one by abe:

Abe:wat the....do we sell..french..fries?

Ralph:Me fail english? thats unpossible

[ahctlucabbuS]

Homer: I'm feeling kinda low, Apu. Got any of that beer that has candy floating in it? Some Skittle.. you know.
Apu: Such a product does not exist, sir. I think you must have dreamed it.
Homer: Oh. Then just give me a six pack and a couple of packets of Skittles.