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Thread: Cinderella

  1. #1
    Cinderella is now 75 years old. After a fulfilling life with the now
    dead Prince, she happily sits upon her rocking chair, watching the world go
    by from her front porch, with a cat named Bob for companionship.
    One sunny afternoon, out of nowhere, appeared the Fairy Godmother.
    Cinderella said "Fairy Godmother, what are you doing here after all these
    years?"
    The Fairy godmother replied, "Cinderella, you have lived an exemplary
    life since I last saw you. Is there anything for which your heart still
    yearns?"
    Cinderella was taken aback, overjoyed, and after some thoughtful
    consideration, and almost under her breath she uttered her first wish: "I
    wish I were wealthy beyond comprehension."
    Instantly, her rocking chair was turned into solid gold.
    Cinderella was stunned. Bob, her old faithful cat, jumped off her lap
    and scampered to the edge of the porch, quivering with fear.
    Cinderella said, "Oh thank you, Fairy Godmother."
    The Fairy Godmother replied "It is the least I can do.
    What does your heart want for your second wish?"
    Cinderella looked down at her frail body, and said: "I wish I were young
    and full of the beauty of youth again"
    At once, her wish became reality, and her beautiful youthful visage
    returned. Cinderella felt stirrings inside her that had been dormant for
    years. A long-forgotten vigor and vitality began to course through her.
    Then the Fairy Godmother again spoke, "You have one more wish, what shall
    you have?"
    Cinderella looks over to the frightened cat in the corner and says, "I
    wish for you to transform Bob, my old cat, into a kind and handsome young
    man."
    Magically, Bob suddenly underwent so fundamental a change in his
    biological make-up that, when complete he stood before her, a man so
    beautiful the likes of which neither she nor the world had ever seen.
    The Fairy Godmother again spoke, "Congratulations, Cinderella. Enjoy
    your new life." And, with a blazing shock of bright blue electricity, she
    was gone.
    For a few eerie moments, Bob and Cinderella looked into each others
    eyes.
    Cinderella sat, breathless, gazing at the most stunningly perfect man
    she had ever seen.
    Then Bob walked over to Cinderella, who sat transfixed in her rocking
    chair, and held her close in his young muscular arms.
    He leaned in close, blowing her golden hair with his warm breath as he
    whispered into Cindrella's ear:
    SCROLL DOWN
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    "Bet you're real sorry you neutered me now!!!!"

  2. Funny S**t   -   #2
    cpt_azad's Avatar Colonel
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Surrey, BC
    Posts
    6,741
    LMFAO that's hilarious

    Jeff Loomis: He's so good, he doesn't need to be dead to have a tribute.

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