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Thread: Changing Lightbulbs

  1. #1
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    Mar 2003
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    Q How many members of the Bush Administration are needed to change a
    light
    bulb?

    A It takes 10:

    1. One to deny that a light bulb needs to be changed.
    2. One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb needs
    to
    be changed.
    3. One to blame Clinton for burning out the light bulb.
    4. One to tell the nations of the world that they are either "for"
    changing
    the light bulb or "for" darkness.
    5. One to give a billion dollar no-bid contract to Halliburton for the
    new
    light bulb.
    6. One to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, standing
    on a
    step ladder under the banner: "Light bulb Change Accomplished".
    7. One administration insider to resign and write a book documenting in
    detail how Bush was literally in the dark.
    8. One to viciously smear #7.
    9. One surrogate to campaign on TV and at rallies on how George Bush
    has had
    a strong light-bulb-changing policy all along.
    10. And finally, one to confuse Americans about the difference between
    screwing a light bulb and screwing the country.

  2. Lounge   -   #2
    zacspeed's Avatar Pheasant plucker
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    Q. How many Manchester Utd fans does it take to change a light bulb?

    A. 100. One to do it & 99 to drive up from Surrey to watch it!

    PS I f*cking HATE football so Flame me all you like!

  3. Lounge   -   #3
    cpt_azad's Avatar Colonel
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    Quote Originally Posted by zacspeed
    Q. How many Manchester Utd fans does it take to change a light bulb?

    A. 100. One to do it & 99 to drive up from Surrey to watch it!

    PS I f*cking HATE football so Flame me all you like!
    surrey??

    Jeff Loomis: He's so good, he doesn't need to be dead to have a tribute.

  4. Lounge   -   #4
    cpt_azad's Avatar Colonel
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    oh wait, england, in that case

    Jeff Loomis: He's so good, he doesn't need to be dead to have a tribute.

  5. Lounge   -   #5
    vidcc's Avatar there is no god
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    How many social workers does it take to change a lightbulb?

    Just one but the bulb must really want to change.


    How many shop assistants does it take to change a lightbulb?

    One...but you must have a receipt

    it’s an election with no Democrats, in one of the whitest states in the union, where rich candidates pay $35 for your votes. Or, as Republicans call it, their vision for the future.

  6. Lounge   -   #6
    ZaZu's Avatar I know stuff ...
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    How many lightbulbs does it take to change a lightbulb?
    donno...don't care


    If you attack the establishment long enough and hard enough, they will make you a member of it.
    -- Art Buchwald --

  7. Lounge   -   #7
    zacspeed's Avatar Pheasant plucker
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    705
    How many David Blaines does it take to change a light bulb?

    One - & it will be really obvious how he does it!

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