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Thread: I Will Survive

  1. #1
    hippychick's Avatar Memo, what memo? BT Rep: +5
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    In a State Of Confusion
    Sung to the tune of

    "I Will Survive"

    Gloria Gaynor

    At first I was afraid, I was petrified,
    When you said you had 10 inches I almost died,

    But I'd spent oh so many years just waiting for a man that long,

    That I grew strong, And I knew that I could take you on
    But there you are,
    Another lie,
    I was ready for a Big Mac and you've bought me a French fry,
    I should have known it was bullshit,
    Just a sad pathetic dream,
    Should have known there was no anaconda lurking in those jeans.

    Go on now go, Walk out the door,
    Don't you promise me 10 inches then turn up with only 4,

    Weren't you a prat to think I wouldn't catch you out,

    Don't you know we're only joking when we say size doesn't count.

    I will survive, I will survive,
    Cos as long as I have batteries,
    My sex life is gonna thrive,
    I will always have good sex with a handful of latex,
    I will survive, I will survive. . hey hey

    It took all my self control not to laugh out loud,
    When I saw your little Wiener standing tall and proud,
    But to hell with all your egos and to hell with all your needs,

    Now I'm saving all my lovin' for a cordless multi-speed,

    Go on now go, Just make a dash,
    Last time I saw a twig that small was inside an eighth of hash,
    I should have asked for confirmation,
    Should have asked for referees,
    Then I wouldn't have you waving that wee winky thing at me.

    Go on now go, Just hit the track,

    Don't you bring me home no tiddlers,
    Cos I'll always throw them back,
    The only thing that I could do with a prick as small as yours

    Is to stick it with a tooth pick, dip it in tomato sauce.

    Go on now go, Get out of my sight,
    I'm going back to my appliance,
    Cos I know it's length is right,
    And if I ever see your tiny tackle at my door,
    You'll be counting up your inches as you pick them off the floor.
    Go on now Go!

  2. Funny S**t   -   #2
    cpt_azad's Avatar Colonel
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Surrey, BC
    I was ready for a Big Mac and you've bought me a French fry,

    Jeff Loomis: He's so good, he doesn't need to be dead to have a tribute.


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