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Thread: speech help

  1. #1
    man im screwed. i have to give a speech tommorow for a wedding and i have no clue what to say. anyone have a site with ready made speeches?
    thx a lot

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    DarthInsinuate's Avatar Died in battle
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    say something along the lines of sleeping with the bride, and the groom
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    manker's Avatar effendi
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    You can't have a site with ready made speeches. You have to relate it to the people you're talking to.

    Basically say the bride looks hawt, that the organisation was excellent, thank the bridesmaids (and give them each a small present) - finally take the piss out of everyone in the room but mostly the groom and his family.

    I gave a speech to that format last summer and most people laughed - except some of his family who cried a bit as I kept making reference to the rough area they're from which was apparently a sore point with the bride's family who were a bit snobbish.

    Anyway, point is to have a few beers before and remember that the rules change for a best man's speech - you're supposed to upset people.
    I plan on beating him to death with his kids. I'll use them as a bludgeon on his face. -

    --Good for them if they survive.

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    Snee's Avatar Error xɐʇuʎs BT Rep: +1
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    Quote Originally Posted by manker
    except some of his family who cried a bit


    Next you'll advise 'im to give the bridesmaids dustbins or something.

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    manker's Avatar effendi
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    Quote Originally Posted by SnnY
    Quote Originally Posted by manker
    except some of his family who cried a bit


    Next you'll advise 'im to give the bridesmaids dustbins or something.
    Who wouldn't like a shiny new chrome bin

    You've just reminded me tho' - he'll also get the right to sexcor the bridesmaids.
    I plan on beating him to death with his kids. I'll use them as a bludgeon on his face. -

    --Good for them if they survive.

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    bigboab's Avatar Poster BT Rep: +1
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    Try here, there are one or two examples. Good luck.

    http://www.hitched.co.uk/speeches/examples/index.asp
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