lvl 9 (the best one) GIVEAWAY

[embolism]

kokoo is my fav for all the generosity he has shown here

I will not even contend for an invite in this mad race, there are many more generous souls here who deserve it

Good luck to you all.

[waterloo]

My mom bakes the best cookies. I win?

[mavenfool]

I already offered disgusting sex acts on page 9, so you're all just wasting your time.

[Tokeman]

I already offered disgusting sex acts on page 9, so you're all just wasting your time.

You didn't even offer a Cleavland Steamer...

[donvito]

ok heres my plea...

i had the WORST day evar evar today...

So, this morning I wake up to check my torrents, internet died in the middle of the night because some genious hit the fucking junction box and took out the whole nieghborhood. Then, as I'm getting ready to go to work, I go outside to start my car, and what do I find? A flat tire. So I get out my jack and whatnot, put on the donut, (keep in mind that it is around 20f outside where I live this time of year), and get the spare on.

Then I start my daily drive to work, no cigarettes, fuck. So I stopped at the gas station, go to the counter to buy a pack, "Oh this is going to be $5 something." Im thinking "WTF?!? When the hell did the cigarette tax go up. Fuck it I need these for today." So I proceed with my checkout and head to work.

Once I got to work, my boss tells me that since the marketing dept. has a tradeshow in a week, that I I I get to clean out the storage area. This is a huge room, about 40m x 60m and it is FILLED with crap. I spent the majority of the morning, until lunch at noon, cleaning this shithole.

Then lunch. No Mountain Dew, FUCK.

After lunch I had to set up computers in a meeting room, so the factory employees can fill out their taxes/health insurance/etc... This was about the only non-terrible part of today.

After work, I went to the local mall to get some pants I saw on sale. I buy the pants, head out to my car and on the way out realize, "Shit these aren't the right ones?!" "How did he buy the wrong pants and not realize?" you might ask... well, I don't know. BAH

SOooo to continue this prosperous venture, I head to the local unnamed mechanic garage to get my flat tire fixed. This is the worst evar.

I walk in greeted by two inbred mongoloids eating cheesecurds.
"Hiya, can I help you today?" Sputters the bigger one.
"Yea, uh, I have a flat tire and I was wondering if I could get it fixed." I said.
"Sure, why don't you bring your car into the garage and we'll take care of it."

I brought my car into the garage and they raised it with a pneumatic lift. CLUNK CLUNK

"So how much is this going to cost?" I asked as he removed my spare.
"Uh, well since it's friday, how about I give you a deal?"

"SWEET" i thought...

After removing the spare, he proceeded to check the air and fill my other tires. He then took one of the cheap $5 tire plug you can get from any hardware store, and plugged my tire.

"So how much do I owe you?" I again asked.
"Hmm, well how about we do this off the books, cash." He said.
"I guess if I'm getting a deal." I though, too stressed and tired to realize what was going on.
"Ok, sounds fine, how much?" I repeated a 3rd time.
"Well, how does $40 sound, at our competitor across the street there, it would be $85, so this is the lowest I can go." He said happily.

"WTF 40 FUCKING DOLLARS?!?!?, I could've done that shit MYSELF!" "AHGHGHG"

So I walked down the street to the nearest atm. "This ATM is currently OUT OF ORDER."

"WEAK, LAME" I yelled in my head.

So, I walked back to the garage, and told him the machine was broken.

"Ok well since I trust you, why don't you go down the road to the other one and get the money." He replied greedily.

"ugh" says I

I got back, reluctantly paid him, and left.

When I got home, my Dad asked me how much it ended up costing.

I told him.



"WTF!?" yelled my Dad. The veins in his neck started to show...

"You just got FUCKED, GOD DAMNNIT, WTF?! Why would the do this shit to a 19yr old kid?!?"

I went to my computer and check the phone # of a local competitor.

"Hello this is Jim, how can I help you today?"
"Uh, yea, how much would you charge to plug a flat?"
"Umm, about $23.99."

"Ugh, I just got fucked, Thanks."

*Click*

My Dad then got on the phone with the prick that took my money and demanded it back, then he got in his truck and headed over there.

When he got there the asshole was at the counter.

"Can I help you today sir?"

"Yea my kid was just in here and you plugged his tire." Dad said.
"ok..."
"YEA AND WTF $40 bullshit is this, YOU'RE A FUCKIN CROOK."

"Well sir you see we charge for time and labor..."

"TIME AND LABOR, WTF, YOU FUCKING PLUGGED A TIRE!?!?! FUCK ME THAT'S NOT EITHER?!"

The guy was happy to give my dad $20 of my money back, but my Dad wasn't finished yet.

"I'm going to call the BBB and ***** corporate and report your ass, I'm going to have your fuckin' job you asshole.

The guy then took the other $20 OUT OF HIS FUCKIN POCKET! He fucking took half my fucking money, hard earned money, and he fuckin pocketed it! WTF

So the guy ended up giving my dad his money back, and that was that.


This was a terrible day, and I just spent 20 mins writing this shit.

Also, my cat died two days ago.

I FUCKING DESERVE THIS.


thanks for your time, I hope you were mildly amused at the least.

donvito

[ibnahmed]

i wonder how u are allowed to do lvl9 giveaway while others are not.

[cristina1]

i want it because this is my post #15 and if you subtract 6 you get 9.

[_coder_]

i want it because this is my post #15 and if you subtract 6 you get 9.

Your a Maths teacher

You deserve it

[Kyl3KK]

i wonder how u are allowed to do lvl9 giveaway while others are not.

I asked Brandon if I could do one here if I ever got one, and he said yeah as long as you're responsible on who you invite... That doesn't make it okay for everyone I guess, but maybe he did the same.

[Polarbear]

i wonder how u are allowed to do lvl9 giveaway while others are not.

I asked Brandon if I could do one here if I ever got one, and he said yeah as long as you're responsible on who you invite... That doesn't make it okay for everyone I guess, but maybe he did the same.

why is it called "level 9" giveaway if it is allowed by staff?

whatever, i don't really care. good luck to everyone.