Anyone Know A Good One

anyone know a good limerick? one i found on a bus stop was.

there was a man from brazil
who swallowed a gunpowder pill
his heart retired
his bum backfired
and his willy shot over the hill

There once was a hermit named Dave
Who had a dead whore in his cave
She shriveled and shrank
and God how she stank!
But think of the money he saved.

There was a young girl from Madrid
Who said she'd be f****d for a quid
Then along come an Italian
With balls like a stalion
He f****d her for nothing, he did.

;)

There was a young girl from Ealing
Who had a peculiar feeling
She lay on her back
And opened her crack
And pissed all over the ceiling

Bonus points to anyone who can say where I got that from :D

Quote:

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Originally posted by Illuminati@25 September 2003 - 08:33
There was a young girl from Ealing
Who had a peculiar feeling
She lay on her back
And opened her crack
And pissed all over the ceiling

Bonus points to anyone who can say where I got that from :D

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Here?

She stood on the bridge at midnight,
her heart was all a quiver.
She gave a cough,her tits fell off,
and floated down the river.

Casey Jones was a son of a bitch
parked his engine by a whorehouse hitch.
went up the stairs with his dick in his hand, then pissed out the window on a bald headed man.
he lined 50 women up against a wall. said bet ya 5 dollars i can f@#k em all.
he f@#ked 49 but he had to stop because his di@k was smokin and his balls were hot.
so he went down stairs and packed em on ice. then came back up and f@cked the last one twice.
when he died he went to hell. fu@ked the devil and his wife as well.
50 little deamons were against the wall, prayin please god help before he f@cks us all!

:o
There was a young girl called heather
Who's cu** flaps were made out of leather
To attract the boys
She made an odd noise
By flapping the edges together

From Howard Brenton's "Play Christie in love"

And before I get accused of being some kind of masoginist here's a joke for the ladies




How many men does it take to tile a bathroom?




one

But you must slice him really thinly
:beerchug: Cheers