Unforgettable first date
This was on the "Tonight Show" with Jay Leno. Jay went into the
audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had.
The winner described her worst first date experience. There
absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!
She said it was midwinter... snowing and quite cold...and the guy
had taken her skiing to Lake Arrowhead. It was a day trip (no overnight). They
were strangers, after all, and truly had never met before. The outing was
fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that
afternoon.
They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began
to realize that she should not have had that extra latte. They were about an
hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere! Her
companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for awhile.
Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came
a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her pee beside
the road, or it would be the front seat of his car. They stopped and she quickly
crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started.
Unfortunately, in the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she
let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion
stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman
and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was the relief she
felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation.
Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation.
As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were
firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to pump handles
immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the
icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due
to the extreme cold.
Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor she answered her
date's concerns about "what is taking so long" with a reply that indeed,
she was "freezing her butt off and in need of some assistance"!
He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her
sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She
too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves,
they assessed her dilemma.
Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced
with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly
cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had gotten her into
the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was
only one way to get her free.
So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded to
unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. As for the Tonight Show...
she took the prize hands down... or perhaps that should be "pants down" And you
thought your first date was embarrassing. Jay Leno's comment - - - -
This gives a whole new meaning to being "pissed off".
