My girlfriend's going on holiday to the Caribbean.
That sounds nice, Jamaica?
No, she's going of her own accord. :pinch:
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My girlfriend's going on holiday to the Caribbean.
That sounds nice, Jamaica?
No, she's going of her own accord. :pinch:
A man with a cucumber in his ear, a carrot in his nose, and a tomato in his eye walks into the doctor's office. He says, "Doc, I'm not feeling well. What's wrong with me?"
The doctor says, "First of all, you're not eating right...."
:no:
How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
Put it in a microwave till it's bill withers
:pinch:
Tiger Woods drives his Beamer into a petrol station to fill her up.
He greets the attendent before bending over to pick up the nozzle, and two tees fall out of his pocket onto the ground.
"What are those?" asks the attendent.
"They're called tees," replies Tiger.
"What are they for?" the attendent asks him.
"They are for resting my balls on when I'm driving," says Tiger.
"Bloody 'ell," says the attendent, "BMW think of everything!"
:ermm:
Why did the tomato blush?
Because he saw the salad dressing :pinch:
Why did the lobster blush?
Because the seaweed :pinch:
What did the big orange say to the little orange?
Nothing, oranges can't talk :pinch:
Why did the pervert cross the road?
He'd got his dick stuck in the chicken :pinch:
freedom fries lol
so bad it actually rofls.