Southern One Liners

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11-10-2003, 07:28 AM
MusicChick

What do you call an Alabama farmer with a sheep under each arm?
A pimp.
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Why do drivers education classes in redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays?
Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.
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What's the difference between a Southern zoo and a Northern zoo?
A Southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage, along with a recipe.
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What's the difference between a Northern fairytale and a Southern fairytale?
A Northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time."
A Southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit."
11-10-2003, 07:35 AM
bub

my wifes from the south and that is some funny shit :D
11-10-2003, 05:12 PM
Supernatural

The driver's ed bit was funny. :D
11-10-2003, 05:53 PM
3rd gen noob

"i sleep with my cousin"

oh, wait, that's not a joke... :rolleyes:
11-10-2003, 06:30 PM
Kunal

Quote:

Originally posted by 3rd gen noob@10 November 2003 - 17:53
"i sleep with my cousin"

oh, wait, that's not a joke... :rolleyes:

that sounds really wrong and twisted
11-10-2003, 06:54 PM
boxofslavery

Man, how true how true.
The saying "it's funny because it's true" never applied more than right now.
The south sucks.
My plan? Take one of those giant tractor chainsaws used to cut up roads, cut out Alabama (including that crappy part of Florida that should be Alabama) and push it into the ocean.
11-10-2003, 07:06 PM
HeavyMetalParkingLot

Quote:

Originally posted by boxofslavery@10 November 2003 - 18:54
Man, how true how true.
The saying "it's funny because it's true" never applied more than right now.
The south sucks.
My plan? Take one of those giant tractor chainsaws used to cut up roads, cut out Alabama (including that crappy part of Florida that should be Alabama) and push it into the ocean.

kinda FUNNY when i see your name and then see you say the south sucks..........
11-10-2003, 07:29 PM
3rd gen noob

Quote:

Originally posted by Kunal+10 November 2003 - 18:30--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (Kunal @ 10 November 2003 - 18:30)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-3rd gen noob@10 November 2003 - 17:53
"i sleep with my cousin"

oh, wait, that's not a joke... :rolleyes:

that sounds really wrong and twisted [/b][/quote]
i did say it wasn't a joke...

people can marry their cousins in some states though...so it's the truth
11-10-2003, 07:42 PM
Kunal

Quote:

Originally posted by 3rd gen noob@10 November 2003 - 19:29
people can marry their cousins in some states though...so it's the truth

thats just fking stupid! im glad i live in the UK :rolleyes:
11-11-2003, 04:33 AM
limeyman25

Liked the Fairytale one...
LMAO!
11-11-2003, 05:23 AM
MusicChick

Quote:

Originally posted by boxofslavery@10 November 2003 - 12:54
The south sucks.
My plan? Take one of those giant tractor chainsaws used to cut up roads, cut out Alabama (including that crappy part of Florida that should be Alabama) and push it into the ocean.

I don't think it does. I'm a southerner and its nice and quiet where I live. ;) Being southern, I still think some of the jokes are funny though. :)
11-11-2003, 05:32 AM
HeavyMetalParkingLot

f'n southerners...............
11-11-2003, 06:25 AM
boxofslavery

Quote:

Originally posted by HeavyMetalParkingLot+10 November 2003 - 19:06--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (HeavyMetalParkingLot @ 10 November 2003 - 19:06)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-boxofslavery@10 November 2003 - 18:54
Man, how true how true.
The saying "it's funny because it's true" never applied more than right now.
The south sucks.
My plan?  Take one of those giant tractor chainsaws used to cut up roads, cut out Alabama (including that crappy part of Florida that should be Alabama) and push it into the ocean.

kinda FUNNY when i see your name and then see you say the south sucks.......... [/b][/quote]
PPL always ask if I'm african american cuz of my name. Actually, a "box of slavery" is what I call that piece in your mind where you lock the bad memories so they can't hurt you. It started out as the name of my memory box, but when I lost it, I still didn't lose the memories. Hence, everyone has their box of slavery. Plus it sounds cooler than "box of joy"

It is in no way a pro KKK reference, if that's what you meant. The south sucks because I got beat up by the KKK for being a "Ni**er-Lover"