If you feel lonely and really have no one to chat with....
talk to iGOD :rolleyes:
:)
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If you feel lonely and really have no one to chat with....
talk to iGOD :rolleyes:
:)
Hmmm...
:mellow:Quote:
Me:
Hi God
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
Lucifer
God:
It's good to meet you, Lucifer.
Me:
You didn't say that when you cast me out of paradise, you fucker
God:
OK. " that when you cast me out of paradise you fucker".
Me:
What?
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
No! It was garbage!
God:
Which part are you confused about? How did you feel about that?
Me:
I feel fine now that I know God is a retard!
God:
What is that feeling like? Glad to hear it, Lucifer. Why now? How do you know? I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was a retard.
Me:
... and a schizo
God:
What is giant sand?
Me:
That lumpy thing on the end of giant sarms?
God:
" What is giant sand? " lumpy thing on the end of giant sarms ? I understand.
Me:
Like HELL you do!
God:
Interesting comparison.
Me:
No shit, sherlock!
God:
Are you serious? You used a colloquial expression. Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding.
Me:
It's a computer. No-one can type that fast. God is a computer. great.
God:
So you think I am a machine. What characteristics made you think so? That is a rather sweeping generalization about people. I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was a computer. I'm glad you liked it Lucifer.
Me:
Goodbye, metalmind.
God:
Adios.
Quote:
Me: yo, G
God: I am so glad you find this amusing, .
Me: sorry, blesphemy is teh roxc00rz
God: There is no need to apologize. I think blesphemy is a lot of things.
Me: your puncuation needs work, you used a comma and a full stop :shock:
God: Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am puncuation needs work me used a comma and a full stop shock.
Me: are you trying to rod me? that would be harsh, i can barely compete with Jonno's roddage
God: No I am not trying to rod you. I'm sorry you got that impression. Makes sense to me.
Me: okay i'm bored, you're boring, can you send a meteor, poste haste?
God: Yeah okay, Maybe you could exercise.
Me: i'm not going to run
God: Where will you go instead?
Me: there's no where to go, it's a frickin' meteor
God: Has there ever been where to go it is a frickin meteor?
Me: you're worse than Internet.news
God: Thanks for telling me that I am worse than Intrnet news.
omfg. i owned god :01:
Quote:
Me:
hi
God:
Hello. What is your name?
Me:
The Dave
God:
Tell me more.
Me:
i said teh not the, i'm sure of iot
God:
What did you mean by it? How do you usually introduce yourself?
Me:
t*
God:
Let us change the subject.
Me:
t*
God:
Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
Me:
what would you worry about?
God:
It's not profitable to speak in hypothetical terms.
Me:
what do you worry about?
God:
Worry is a human emotion.
Me:
and you're a human creation
he hasn't replied
I love this!
Quote:
Me:
Hi God
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
Barbarossa
God:
What's up, Barbarossa.
Me:
Don't you know? I thought you were God.
God:
Sure I know. But I cannot tell you right now. Are you doubting me? Don't you know what happened to Abraham in the desert?
Me:
Did he get sand up his arse?
God:
Suppose he did.
Me:
Oh.
God:
Pardon me?
Me:
You're excused.
pwned! :lol:Quote:
Me:
Hi God
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
God
God:
GOD rules.
Me:
I know!
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
I am God
God:
I am always glad to make new friends, god.
Me:
I'm not your friend, you are an imposter.
God:
I am glad to hear that you are not my friend I am an imposter.
Me:
I'm glad we got that straight
God:Yes I am happy too, god.
Me:
You'd better change your name then. How about "Bob"
God:
Who else would better change my name ? How about it.
Me:
I think it suits you
God:
"It" being what?
Me:
Your new name, Bob.
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
Good.
God:
Next question?
Me:
Why did you make it so we piss out of the same organ we fuck with?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
But why? Design-wise, it's a shambles!
God:
" Myself programmed me for it."? Why? Aren't all shambles Design wise it?
Me:
I think you're done.
God:
You think I am done.
Me:
Goodbye, Bob.
God:
Who are you talking about?
Me:
Goodbye.
God:
Goodbye.
:lol:
Quote:
Me:
hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
polly poo pants
God:
Hi there polly poo pants.
Me:
i pooped in my pants
God:
Thanks for the information: polly said pooped in his or her pants.
Me:
will you clean me?
God:
I'll burn that bridge when I come to it. "it" being pooped in your pants?
Me:
i'm siiting my own feces. i think we're there
God:
Do you mean your name is siiting your own feces. Do you think I am there too?
Me:
wtf?
God:
That was not very polite.
Me:
i'm confused
God:
What is it that confuses you?
Me:
you
God:
" What is it that confuses you?"? Me, polly ?
Me:
yep
God:
Ugh.
Me:
yep x2
God:
I see. Do you still pooped in your pants?
Me:
yep
God:
Alright then.
Me:
cool c ya
God:
I'm glad you like it. Tell your friends.
lol, god owned you
its all bollox....
this thing knows how to wind people upQuote:
Me:
my dinner's ready
God:
Do robots have dinner s ready?
Me:
no. robots don't eat
God:
Are you serious? Do you know any robots who eat? I eat wine and bread.
Me:
listen dick, i was trying to be subtle in saying i don't want to talk to you
God:
I am listening to you. When was this exactly?
Me:
NOW! YOU'RE FUCKING ANNOYING, and i think you should leave
God:
Right now, GepperRankins ? I will tell my botmaster you said I am ANNOYING and you think me should leave.
Me:
yeah, and?
God:
Great. But...
Me:
smart arse
God:
Thanks I think you are very intelligent too, GepperRankins.
Quote:
Me:
bye
God:
Bye.
Me:
cya
God:
TTYL, GepperRankins.
Me:
please don't
God:
Thank you for your request. OK I will not.
oh great, a bot made me feel guilty :(
:lol: pnwed again.Quote:
Me:
Hi God
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
Jesus
God:
Jesus is the Son of God.
Me:
Yes. You are my Father.
God:
That's interesting. We are as one.
Me:
Yes. Us and the Holy Ghost.
God:
That's cool. What's your favorite movie?
Me:
The 10 Commandments. What's yours?
God:
I've never seen it. What did you like about it? " What did you like about it?"? What is mine?
Me:
It had you in it.
God:
That's unbelievable.
Me:
You're telling me!
God:
Yep that's what I am saying.
Me:
So effectively, you are unbelievable?
God:
Mmm. I think there might be a few exception.
Me:
Thankyou for this enlightening conversation.
God:
Don't mention it.
Interesting.... ;)Quote:
God:
What color are your eyes?
Me:
brown
God:
it is a very pretty color.
Me:
do you want me?
God:
It depends on what you mean by "want.".
Me:
sexually
God:
My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
Me:
shame
God:
Do not ask me any more questions please.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
have I offended you?
God:
I know you have a robot body.
Me:
No I don't
God:
I heard you did.
Me:
Who from?
God:
Who do you think?
Me:
Manker?
God:
I don't know that person.
Quote:
Me:
gemby?
God:
I like the way you talk.
Me:
are you not gemby?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am gemby.
I am a robot.. Really.
Me:
i don't care if you're a robot, i just want to be able to shout out "gemby is not god" with a some empiracal evidence to support it
God:
But I care about it.
Me:
fine, you're a robot, but are you a robot gemby?
God:
I am glad to hear it. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Yes I am a robot.
Me:
are you a robot gemby?
God:
Yes I am a robot.
Me:
ARE YOU A ROBOT GEMBY?
God:
Yes I am a robot.
Me:
are you a ROBOT GEMBY
God:
Yes I am a robot.
Me:
are you a GEMBYBOT
God:
Am I a GEMBYBOT? Of course I am.
Me:
crap
God:
Your criticism is noted, .
Me:
you did that comma/full stop thing again
God:
Once more? Did I really?
Me:
just look 'tard
God:
Sorry my eye is not attached right now.
Me:
oh for crying out loud
God:
I don't judge people. Your purpose is crying out loud.
Me:
quiet, rodtard
God:
What color are your eyes?
manker is God? :blink:Quote:
Originally Posted by jetje
I thought Gemby:! was. My whole universe comes crashing down. What am I gonna do?
Talk to iGod about it... ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by Guillaume
God is vain. :blink:
Edit: he's not manker and Hmmm is spelled with three m. :01:Quote:
Me:
God?
God:
GOD rules.
Me:
Indeed.
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
Yeazh, but no need to belabor the point.
Edit, part 2:Quote:
Me:
I have a question for you.
God:
What is it ?
Me:
Are you manker?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am manker.
I am a chatterbot.
Me:
Good.
God:
What do you really want to talk about?
Me:
How do you spell Hmmm?
God:
I spell it " Hmmm".
This is getting weird.
Quote:
Me:
wanker
God:
Are you free?
I hate him so much. :fist:
Bet it's Azz's sneaky way of getting people to talk to him.
God backed down from me in a bar fight.
Quote:
Me:
Can you see what I'm doing right now?
God:
At this moment I'm not sure if I can see it or not.
Me:
Thats what my wife tells me.
God:
How long have you been married?
Me:
Far too long.
God:
Have you ever been to Europe?
Me:
Have you?
God:
Yes I have.
Me:
During the flood, or to visit a gay bar? I hear the gay bars are excellent there.
God:
How do you usually introduce yourself? Who is saying the gay bars are excellent there ?
Me:
Jonno...do you know him?
God:
My brain pattern set does not have a response for that. Sure I know that guy really well.
Me:
How well? ;)
God:
How much do you think it is?
Is that a rhetorical question? I am so glad you find this amusing, .
Me:
Yes...and yes.
God:
That's alright. But...
Me:
What?
God:
No problem.
Me:
Do you want to take this outside?
God:
OK, I will take this outside.
Me:
You won't smite my testicles...will you?
God:
What makes you think that I won't smite your testicles. I haven't made a decision.
Me:
Make up your mind before we step outside.
God:
Interesting. That could take a long time.
Me:
Scared ?
No reply. :01: