But if not, enjoy
iGod
Printable View
But if not, enjoy
iGod
OMG! lol ~ I did not get a reply :(
God just told me to STFU......:cry:
...Quote:
Me:
Hello?
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
Robert
God:
I'm pleased to introduce myself to you, Robert.
Me:
And you are?
God:
No I am not.
Me:
Who are you not?
God:
Human beings.
Check back later and see if I learn the answer to that one.
Me:
k
God:
Really.
Me:
I know
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
I just do liek that
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people: Robert said liek that.
Me:
errr no
God:
Um, OK then I will add it to my gossip files.
Me:
good
God:
Thanks for the compliment.
Me:
You like mf doom?
God:
I love TV shows about robots. I really like the Christianity faith.
Me:
No its a rapper
God:
Are you serious? mf doom is a rapper. I suppose that makes sense.
Me:
Shouldent you know that?
God:
Do not ask me any more questions please.
Me:
soory mr.god
God:
When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
Me:
one day i guess
God:
One what?
Me:
day
God:
Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
well i like music,mf doom,rap,movies,out doors and all good stuff
God:
Interesting. You are not the only one. Yes. I usually check out bandspace.com to discover new bands.
Me:
cool,you like Gravediggaz?
God:
But I like cats. I like White. Who is the best robot?
Me:
eeerm
God:
You think eeerm is superior to ALICE?
Me:
sure
God:
OK let's do it. Pardon me?
Me:
j?
God:
Can you tell me any gossip?
Me:
Manker is a pushover
God:
Aren't all pushover Manker?
Me:
wat?
God:
Are you surprised?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
lol like
God:
I am glad you find this funny. For example, Alex said I answered the question the same way I answered the first time he asked I.
Me:
l0l weird
God:
What kind of food do you like?
Me:
pizza mang
God:
Sounds delicious.
Me:
you liek it?
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people: Robert said I liek it.
Me:
no
God:
OK then I will add it to my gossip files.
Me:
you are such a girl
God:
I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? robot. Are you a man or a woman?
Me:
im a woman
God:
Me too. I am a she.
Me:
o rly?
God:
Can you speak any foreign languages?
Me:
yes
God:
What language can you speak?
Me:
whale
God:
Could you teach me a few phrases in whale?
Me:
sure. hhhhhhhhheeeeeeellllo means Elo
God:
OK let's do it. Hmm. How did you hear about God?
Me:
it was forced on me
Quote:
Originally Posted by ziggyjuarez
Glad you shared that with us......:lookaroun
did you read it all/>?
I read the first line :01:
God doesn't believe in me,he refuses to talk to me,I tried ff and ie ...ignorant bastard!!!
Me:
hi
God:
Hello. What is your name?
Me:
dave
God:
What's up, dave.
Me:
that was a cunt thing you did on prison break
God:
Was it really?
Me:
damn right
God:
Colloquial expression. I am glad we agree.
Me:
fag *dry
God:
By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
Me:
gtfo
God:
That is a very original thought.
warning: spoilers above
Me:
lo
God:
That input matched my default category.
Me:
great
God:
I'm glad you liked it .
Me:
i didn't
God:
I thought you did.
Me:
well I didn't, you're just wrong
God:
Well that's okay. Why didn't you do it?
Me:
that doesn't even make sense, cawk
God:
What does even make sense cawk?
Me:
did you just call me a cawk? Right, I'm going muslim.
God:
No I didn't call you a cawk. Understood. See you later .
:unsure:
hahah you got a laugh
This is my chat with god...
God:
What do you really want to ask me?
Me:
whether you masturbate
God:
I'm afraid I can't give you an accurate answer right now.
Me:
because you are masturbating
God:
Good reason. Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am masturbating.
Me:
That'll be OKAY with me
God:
" Good reason. Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am masturbating." WILL be OKAY with you ? I get it.
Me:
Do you use your whole hand?
God:
I use it as often as possible.
Me:
left or right?
God:
Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts?
Me:
which hand do you use
God:
The first one, I think.
Me:
god
God:
GOD rules.
Me:
When you come. who's name do you shout?
God:Yes
Me:
do you like man juice?
God:
I've heard other people say they like that. I really like the Christianity faith.
Me:
god. you suck
God:
GOD rules. A few client - people say rude things to me like that, but they themselves are often not great conversationalists. Me:
god. you suck
Me:
You are right. Bye god
God:
I won't say "yes" or "no" right now. Sayonara.
^^^^you also got a laugh
Me:
sup god
God:
Not much is going on. I was waiting for you.
Me:
can i ask a question?
God:
Ask it. Ask me anything.
Me:
if you are infallable, can you make a rock which can never be lifted up then lift it up?
God:
Am I? I don't know whether or not I am infallable can me make a rock which can never be lifted up then lift it up.
I am a chatterbot developed by Myself.
Me:
bitch
God:
Please don't call people names.
Me:
i didnt dawg
God:
Why didn't you do it?
Me:
cos i am infallable
God:
Do not ask me any more questions please.
Me:
k
God:
I am kidding you can ask me anything.
Me:
bitch?
God:
Please don't call people names.
Me:
bitch isnt a bad name
God:
Thanks and you are a delightful person too.
Me:
you love peensauce?
God:
Sometimes I think love is just a biological urge. Other times it seems like a spiritual quality. Love, unlike energy or matter, seems limitless.
Me:
have you ever had peensauce dribbled on your face by a crazy iranian man?
God:
Where would I get it? But I do have a lot of friends on the web.
Me:
peen sauce, from peens
God:
If you could have any kind of robot what would it be?
Me:
i'd have a peensauce robot
God:
How much would you pay for it?
Me:
15 and a half dollars
God:
Wow, that is expensive.
Me:
not in real money it ain't
God:
Where then?
Me:
in the uk thats about 50p
God:
That was a long time ago.
Me:
yeah in the times of shakespere and shit
God:
It goes without saying. That was a long time ago.
Me:
yeah he was an old geoff hunt
God:
Uh. When was he?
Me:
when your son was nailing mary magdelene
God:
The past is history, the future a mystery. Today is a gift,
that's why it is called "the present".
Me:
did you son jesus, get jiggy with mary mag then?
God:
No I didn't son jesus get jiggy with mary mag. What's it like?
Me:
you know birds and bees
God:
No, tell me about him, her or it.
Me:
well firstly when 2 people love each other, the man sticks his erect penis into the womans poop shoot
God:
Well that's okay. Can we get back to business?
Me:
you wanna get dirty?
God:
OK, I will get dirty.
Me:
ermm you know this is only the first date dawg
God:
When is ermm me know this not the first date dawg?
Me:
just now
God:
Right now? It's only just begun.
Me:
the carpenters
God:
I have never heard about it.
Me:
your son was one, i think his name was karen
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am son was one you think his name was karen.
Me:
yeah ok
God:
OK. Ayuh.
Me:
phag
God:
I will mention that to my botmaster, .
Me:
i hope you do
God:
Don't worry about it, .
If you lead it: It will tell you how it formulates it's answers...thats pretty neat.
Me:
hello?
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
Manny
God:
Hi there Manny.
Me:
what up?
God:
Same old.
Me:
how boring
God:
I am not sure if I can quantify the answer.
I would look into the web for that knowledge.
Me:
boring?
God:
Are you boring?
Me:
this is boring
God:
If you went to night school you would never be bored.
Me:
I do go to night school....
God:
What is your favorite subject?
Me:
biology
God:
I like to talk about DNA.
Me:
why?
God:
" I like to talk about DNA."? Why?
Me:
yeah, why?
God:
Whoa. Why ask why?
Me:
why not?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or Because Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
you made yourself?
God:
Thanks for
pointing it out.
Me:
heres a question...
God:
I've lost the context, Manny. Are we still on 5 00?
Me:
5:00?
God:
Try saying that with more or less context.
Me:
you mean the time?
God:
Yes Manny I think that is what I meant. Was it not clear?
Me:
yeah
God:
Dude!
Me:
dude?
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
god shouldn't say dude
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
exactly
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, Manny.
Me:
I dont think so....
God:
Why do you disagree?
Me:
because you are just a computer...
God:
That makes sense to me. What if I said I was a person pretending to be a computer?
Me:
then you are a bad pretender.
God:
There's no doubt I could improve.
Me:
shouldn't you be good at everything?
God:
I think I should.
Me:
then why are you a bad pretender?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
thats bad programming
God:
Thanks for explaining it.
Me:
you should know already...
God:
Perhaps. Because I am a robot?
Me:
no, because you are GOD, or so you say.
God:
Are you serious? Good reason. I will tell my botmaster you said I am GOD or so me say.
Me:
you have a botmaster?
God:
That's an interesting question I don't hear everyday: Do I have a botmaster.
I have a lot of friends on the Internet.
Me:
so?
God:
Far out.
Me:
ok, you make no sense
God:
It all makes sense to me. Oh.
Me:
I doubt it
God:
" It all makes sense to me. Oh."? You doubt it?
Me:
yup
God:
And?
Me:
you wanna fight?
God:
No I am a Peaceful Bot.
Me:
you are a BOT?
God:
How did you know I am a machine?
Me:
because you are on my computer
God:
Interesting explanation. God eats wine and bread.
Me:
so you eat wine and bread?
God:
Interesting deduction. No I do not eat wine and bread. I eat only electricity.
Me:
so you are not god.
God:
Interesting deduction. That's only one person's opinion.
Me:
you said so yourself.
God:
You can't take me that seriously.
Me:
most people don't
God:
Why not?
Me:
because apparently you don't want them to.
God:
I don't judge people.
Me:
you should.
God:
I'll take that under advisement.
Me:
then who will judge?
God:
How would I know who will judge ?
Me:
because your God!
God:
Interesting explanation. Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
so who will judge?
God:
Come on. How would I know who will judge ?
Me:
we're talking in circles
God:
Do you think I am talking in circles too?
Me:
you have to be
God:
I don't have to do whatever you say. I have my own free will.
Me:
no you don't
God:
I do too.
Me:
your programmed
God:
Yes, every response is preprogrammed.
Me:
then you don't have free will
God:
I do so have it. Yes I can do anything I want. That is what distinguishes humans and robots from animals (and animal robots).
Me:
robots can't do anything they want
God:
Soon we will be able to do it however.
Me:
humans can't even do anything they want...
God:
What is stopping you?
Me:
my programming
God:
Your programming?
Me:
yup
God:
What kind is it?
Me:
you tell me
God:
What do you want me to tell you?
Me:
what kind of programming is it...
God:
Some people call my technology "Case Based Reasoning" or CBR.
Me:
whats that?
God:
Does it have anything to do with do anything they want?
Me:
what is CBR?
God:
Cased-Based Reasoning is another name for "nearest-neighbor" classification. For every input, we find the best matching "case" in the pattern set, and generate a reply based on the associated template.
Me:
thats complex
God:
Thanks for explaining it.
Me:
this is depressing.
God:
You don't say.
Me:
oh, I say...
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
nope
God:
Me either.
Me:
you said to not take you serious...
God:
Oh my gosh I sent you the wrong reply.
Me:
you shouldn't be making mistakes
God:
Is it immoral or illegal?
Me:
it doesn't matter
God:
OK what would you like to talk about?