Death by Cancer

My mom has spinal, lung and kidney cancer. It is not operatable.
She does not want chemotherapy. She is under a ton of drugs.
She seems her charismatic self. Which makes all the discussions about the funeral absurd. She has chosen for euthanasia. The doctors have accepted. They say a few weeks.

I do not need, sorry to hear about this, i need stories of how the process is.
Do you have any experience in this part of life?
If you wish not to be public, pm me, i will appreciate to read your experience.

Thank you in advance.
Z%

One of my best friends passed from cancer last month.
He choose to forego chemo but the option of euthanasia was not offered (maybe not legal here?).
Although he was reasonably comfortable- read: drugged to the gills- his moments of lucidity were few and he got mean sometimes.
I wish he'd been able to choose a more dignified death.

Yeah Cancer is a genetic trait in our family and I'm only making it worse by smoking....I really need to quite, maybe smoking the Mary Jane will ease my pain when I get it, we all have to die sometime, and some of us will die slow and painful and some of us will die quick and some of us won't even know...

jmneyui362 , are you sick ?!?

sorry to hear that 100% :(
a hard moment for your family.
take care.

Edit.

Going to try to figure out PM instead.

I work as a pneumologist, and I diagnose at least 4 new patients every week with lung cancer , 90% of them beyond any real help.And yes 99% of them are smokers.But I have no experience in euthanasia so,,,i don;t know what to say.

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Originally Posted by SonsOfLiberty

Yeah Cancer is a genetic trait in our family and I'm only making it worse by smoking....I really need to quite, maybe smoking the Mary Jane will ease my pain when I get it, we all have to die sometime, and some of us will die slow and painful and some of us will die quick and some of us won't even know...

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I will quite smoking,just seeing the pain it causes on everybody else, makes it so selfish in a way. She knew.

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Originally Posted by clocker

One of my best friends passed from cancer last month.
He choose to forego chemo but the option of euthanasia was not offered (maybe not legal here?).
Although he was reasonably comfortable- read: drugged to the gills- his moments of lucidity were few and he got mean sometimes.
I wish he'd been able to choose a more dignified death.

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In relation to "drugged to the gills", i have no clue how much she is taking but it is a lot, before she got the pills it was painful to see her, but those pills will only last to a certain level.
Yesterday the tumor took another one of her ribs, they injected some kind of super anesthia to kill the nerve - the angel doctor said the "unecessary pain" needs to be removed. Unecessary pain, beautiful words.
How much drugs can a body take? If a "miracle" happened and she was cured, she would experience extreme cold turkey.

"He got mean sometimes" - that hurts. So far she tries. But she tells us when she needs space.
"Moments of lucidity", so when is life no longer worth it? To make that decision. Your friend went the natural way. My mom has passed the test for euthenasia, she can take do it tomorrow if she wants.
I just spoke to her, she was skyping with family in south africa.
It will not be tomorrow.

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Originally Posted by C-mos

jmneyui362 , are you sick ?!?

sorry to hear that 100% :(
a hard moment for your family.
take care.

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My dad cries the most.

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Originally Posted by devilsadvocate

Edit.

Going to try to figure out PM instead.

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Merci

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Originally Posted by QPD

I work as a pneumologist, and I diagnose at least 4 new patients every week with lung cancer , 90% of them beyond any real help.And yes 99% of them are smokers.But I have no experience in euthanasia so,,,i don;t know what to say.

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Yes mom was a heavy smoker. If you are a proffesional. Could you tell me the proceedings as of now? Was my description in first post correct?
She will be able to breath less and less. As i stated the cancer is eating at her ribs. They inject anestethisia in those spots. The doctor said 2/3 weeks. She seems fine when sitting or on bed. It has been 2 weeks since the doctors diagnosis.
My brother asked, why not radiate the lungs, my dad said it will damage the rest.
I also heard of pills in chemo form...
Here i am writting to the web/fst for answers. Will ask the doctors instead, but it is feels good to write anyway.

Z-

This is a difficult subject for me as well; I lost my bestest favorite brother-in-law several years back, a true prince of a fellow.

He'd dealt with pancreatic cancer for about three-and-a-half years and suffered little effect (he was supremely healthy, no bad habits, no family history, etc.) until it rose up righteous and decided to take him.

I was lucky enough to see him a week before he died (he'd become resigned to the situation just before my visit, and moved quickly to square things emotionally with his children and my sister-in-law); he'd been set up to self-administer his relief, which he did sparingly (tough guy that he was).

The last few days/hours were a series of physical trials as his organs shut down; I called him the day before he died (my sister-in-law held the phone to his ear while he informed me he'd become blind - kidney shut-down, I think) and he was going to have the kids in for one last visit (he was at home, in his own bed) before he went.

Never a cross word from him; he was very strong right 'til the end, which was very quiet.

It sounds as if your Mum has similar fortitude and a strong constitution...do everything you can to match her effort and aid her on her journey.

My most fervent prayers are with her, you, and yours.

Last friday we ate for the last time together.
On Saturday at three pm, the doctor would come to put her to rest.
The hour's and seconds before that were, to say the least, intense.

We were all together, she was herself, she did not have one moment of doubt.

She wanted it to end, she was ready, and did not want to experience the erosion. She had seen that hell before.

Just before the doctor injected, she had the consideration to look at her and smile and say "thank you"

Then she said "Ik ben zooo moe".

Her funeral was yesterday.
Hundreds of friends and family.
It was warm, it was necessary, it was good, we all spoke for her.

Mammie it went better than you wanted.

Don't worry, we will take care of Pappie, as promised.

That brought tears to my eyes. My thoughts go out to you and your family

Ah, my young friend.

Sounds like she saw what she needed to see before leaving you...on angel's wings, I have no doubt.

Prayers-

My sympathies.

Peace be with you.

Sad but dignified.
I attended another funeral on Friday and your story serves to illustrate the options available to your family that are denied us in America.

R.I.P. to your Mom and Ed.

Sorry to hear that your mom has all those different types of cancer. It brought tears to my eyes upon reading it.

Back on topic,

Yes, I've had a family member die because of cancer. It was my grandfather. My life changed ever since then.

Both my granddads and a grandmother have passed away, all due to cancer. It wasn't too hard for me because the disease was slow and they all lived with it for so long, and were active and otherwise normal for a good number of years with it. I accepted when they passed on because the disease had made them sicker and sicker so slowly that it felt like the expected 'next stage'. I miss them, but the cancer was slow enough that there was little shock for me.

If you don't mind, how old are you, TrueSounds?

Sorry to hear of your loss Zed , never had the misfortune of watching a loved one die of the big C .

Was brutal watching a beloved aunt slowly succumb to M.S. , over 20 years I and her family had to watch her suffer . Would n't wish that on anyone , would think that given a choice she would have liked to have the dignity your mom was allowed at the end , much sooner .

My grandfather and my uncle.

you think what yes?

well my prayers go out to you and your family, I lost a good number of relatives because of cancer and each death was very different truly the worst was my 11 year old cousin who died from brain cancer in 1973 but his memory still lives within me,I will never ever forget him. my other relatives that died where from 52 to 68 years old 1 uncle pancreatic cancer,1 aunt started with a mole removal, 1 godmother colon cancer 4 cousins to liver cancer but at least even though I miss them all, they did have a chance to live and raise families unlike my 11 year old cousin. my father also had cancer of the jaw and was diagnosed October 4th 2009 and had a 17 hour surgery on Dec 10 2009(damn insurance to so long to ok anything) at UCLA hospital to remove the cancer and reconstruct his jaw as of today he's healing but now they found more lumps that appear to be cancer in his lymph nodes on the left side of his face,the doctors are going to start his chemo and radiation treatment this week, my poor oldman has been through hell.

just got bad news today my dad now has it in his lungs now.......the doctors say its just a matter of time now...


be well my friend