What can I do?

Usually when I have sexy times with a man he wants to do it again. In this case, the plaintiff, who we shall refer to only as 'R' insists that although he would like to spend more time with me sex is by no means a foregone conclusion. I think it is. Obviously I could just rape him like I normally do, but I would really like to try consensual sex for once in my life. Since the feted occasion of our coupling I have been trying to show an interest in his shit and sending him Youtube clips of the Borg and Dominion wars (Star Trek franchise) in an attempt to inflame his ardour. To be honest I'm almost out of ideas. We have arranged a Star Trek DVD fest at his place over the Xmas period. Would it be too much to turn up as Jeri Ryan in a Santa outfit? Obviously I want to avoid this sort of thing happening:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=85O6HISsUTk

:eyebrows:

Maybe next time drive European or American, and try not bag the Honda.

For the record, my relationship with pussy as follows:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-7s2PAxsww

I don't understand the question. Are we saying he doesn't want to get all up in your toilet parts? :eyebrows:

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Originally Posted by Mr. Mulder

I don't understand the question. Are we saying he doesn't want to get all up in your toilet parts? :eyebrows:

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I think she's saying he wants to take it slow, a raincheck on the toiletries.

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Originally Posted by mjmacky

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Originally Posted by Mr. Mulder

I don't understand the question. Are we saying he doesn't want to get all up in your toilet parts? :eyebrows:

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I think she's saying he wants to take it slow, a raincheck on the toiletries.

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He may be fagnostic, and just trying to discover his 'true' feelings.

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Originally Posted by Artemis

He may be fagnostic, and just trying to discover his 'true' feelings.

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She didn't say she already told him about her penis. Perhaps amorous inklings revealed a bulge and scared off the prey :idunno:

I don't understand the question.

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Originally Posted by mjmacky

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Originally Posted by Artemis

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Originally Posted by mjmacky

I think she's saying he wants to take it slow, a raincheck on the toiletries.

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He may be fagnostic, and just trying to discover his 'true' feelings.

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She didn't say she already told him about her penis. Perhaps amorous inklings revealed a bulge and scared off the prey :idunno:

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'Fagnostic' :glag:

Is that what he's saying, that he wants to take it slow??! WTF! I don't have sexy with gheys.

PS. I strapped my penis down and got him drunk, he was none the wiser :smilie4:

He's probably a bit scared of you. More sex, and he'll soon be over it.

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Originally Posted by Squeamous

Usually when I have sexy times with a man he wants to do it again. In this case, the plaintiff, who we shall refer to only as 'R' insists that although he would like to spend more time with me sex is by no means a foregone conclusion. I think it is.

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Way to go, Reject! *High five* Who says stalking doesn't pay off?

Now if you could just get past the part of you being the ghey...

:glag:

And, isn't this more your normal standard for entry, Sq? How did his application get moved to the top of the stack without being qualified? :unsure:

http://movieclips.com/Zf5G-real-geni...ry-smart-girl/

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Originally Posted by megabyteme

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Originally Posted by Squeamous

Usually when I have sexy times with a man he wants to do it again. In this case, the plaintiff, who we shall refer to only as 'R' insists that although he would like to spend more time with me sex is by no means a foregone conclusion. I think it is.

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Way to go, Reject! *High five* Who says stalking doesn't pay off?

Now if you could just get past the part of you being the ghey...

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:lol:
It all makes perfect sense now.

In all seriousness, Squeams, you're obviously doing it wrong in some way.

Maybe you're only partly to blame but if you've chosen some old guy, a homosexual or a hippy, then of course they're not going to want sex very much.
If your target is none of those things, then you have a problem and I think I can help.

You're hungry and your mother gives you a cake. You eat one and although you're still hungry, you don't accept a second.
Given that you wouldn't want to offend your mam and you have a physical need for cake, it can only be because the cake sucked.

So you're doing sex wrong. At least from a guy's perspective.
zomg i'm a guy!1 You can re-create the scene with, um, a mannequin or a teddy or something else - and we'll get to the bottom of this connundrum via the gift of skype :eyebrows:



That scene with Seven and Harry in this context was pretty damn awesome, btw :happy:

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Originally Posted by manker

:lol:
It all makes perfect sense now.

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I'm glad it does too you, I get more confused every time I come here.

I'm apparently a ghey lesbian misognistic stalker paedophile with a superiority complex, I do wish you fuckers would make your mind up. I'm starting to struggle to fill all of these roles at the same time. See the misogynist one I can manage, and I can cope with the superiority complex that you've all added on top of that, but now I'm confused because you've got me stalking a woman I don't talk too, and I can't quite figure out why a misogynist with a superiority complex would stalk a woman who he would obviously consider inferior. Stalker or misogynist with a supiority complex? Also if I'm ghey as well as a paedophile, what interest is it that I have in women? Now if I was a lesbian you might have something, but I think I might be missing some vital parts to be a lesbian.

You're all fucking incredible. Keep flailing around trying to figure me out it's entertaining me :lol:

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Originally Posted by rejectOfAllah

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Originally Posted by manker

:lol:
It all makes perfect sense now.

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I'm glad it does too you, I get more confused every time I come here.

I'm apparently a ghey lesbian misognistic stalker paedophile with a superiority complex, I do wish you fuckers would make your mind up. I'm starting to struggle to fill all of these roles at the same time. See the misogynist one I can manage, and I can cope with the superiority complex that you've all added on top of that, but now I'm confused because you've got me stalking a woman I don't talk too, and I can't quite figure out why a misogynist with a superiority complex would stalk a woman who he would obviously consider inferior. Stalker or misogynist with a supiority complex? Also if I'm ghey as well as a paedophile, what interest is it that I have in women? Now if I was a lesbian you might have something, but I think I might be missing some vital parts to be a lesbian.

You're all fucking incredible. Keep flailing around trying to figure me out it's entertaining me :lol:

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You're just adding everything that's ever been said about you into a gigantic word brick.

I'll summarise:
You're a decent kind of a chap who had a thing for a chick who posts here but got hurt and that exacerbated your general disillusionment with humans - and you like to fuck around with hyperbole on the internets.
Oh, and your tenuous grip on grammar enabled me to 'prove' that you're ghey in that other thread :ghey:

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Originally Posted by manker

You're just adding everything that's ever been said about you into a gigantic word brick.

I'll summarise:
You're a decent kind of a chap who had a thing for a chick who posts here but got hurt and that exacerbated your general disillusionment with humans - and you like to fuck around with hyperbole on the internets.
Oh, and your tenuous grip on grammar enabled me to 'prove' that you're ghey in that other thread :ghey:

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Nope! Try again.

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Originally Posted by rejectOfAllah

Nope! Try again.

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Willdo, chief.
Just as soon as I've finished watching the 5th series of Friends and lobbying for a ban on lesbian porn.

So is that it then? An end to the pollution of every thread with random guesses about who I am, cause it's just getting entertaining.

I've already nailed it.
Sorry that my analysis doesn't quite match up to your self-perception but the truth is regularly more mundane than fiction.

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Originally Posted by megabyteme

He's probably a bit scared of you. More sex, and he'll soon be over it.

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Thanks lovely, I knew you would make it all better. I'll just ease him into it with a dab of chloroform behind my ears and Bob's your uncle, he will be mine.

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Originally Posted by megabyteme

And, isn't this more your normal standard for entry, Sq? How did his application get moved to the top of the stack without being qualified? :unsure:

http://movieclips.com/Zf5G-real-geni...ry-smart-girl/

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Doesn't want to download :(

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Originally Posted by manker

I've already nailed it.
Sorry that my analysis doesn't quite match up to your self-perception but the truth is regularly more mundane than fiction.

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:)

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Originally Posted by manker

In all seriousness, Squeams, you're obviously doing it wrong in some way.

Maybe you're only partly to blame but if you've chosen some old guy, a homosexual or a hippy, then of course they're not going to want sex very much.
If your target is none of those things, then you have a problem and I think I can help.

You're hungry and your mother gives you a cake. You eat one and although you're still hungry, you don't accept a second.
Given that you wouldn't want to offend your mam and you have a physical need for cake, it can only be because the cake sucked.

So you're doing sex wrong. At least from a guy's perspective.
zomg i'm a guy!1 You can re-create the scene with, um, a mannequin or a teddy or something else - and we'll get to the bottom of this connundrum via the gift of skype :eyebrows:

That scene with Seven and Harry in this context was pretty damn awesome, btw :happy:

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Wow, my confidence has plummetted to an all-time low. Not only am I now worried I'm bad in bed, but I'm now worried that you think I'm bad in bed. The fact that you've slipped a sexual advance in there is making me almost as eager to please as the last fat girl in the club at 2am. I'll do anything Manky, ANYTHING:wub::naughty:

Spoiler: Show

NOT!

(that scene isn't really very far from the truth actually :P)

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Originally Posted by manker

I've already nailed it.
Sorry that my analysis doesn't quite match up to your self-perception but the truth is regularly more mundane than fiction.

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Really? Where's that post then?

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Originally Posted by Squeamous

Wow, my confidence has plummetted to an all-time low. Not only am I now worried I'm bad in bed, but I'm now worried that you think I'm bad in bed. The fact that you've slipped a sexual advance in there is making me almost as eager to please as the last fat girl in the club at 2am. I'll do anything Manky, ANYTHING:wub::naughty:

Spoiler: Show

NOT!

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Damn your spoiler. Damn it to hell.
I was so sure my (completely altruistic) plan would work - and then you splayed its inner workings for all to see, like some kind of frog in a lab.

You know, you're kinda funny for a girl. Maybe you could try and tell some jokes about aids or jews. Guys like that kinda thing :idunno:
Failing that, do the Jeri Ryan Santa outfit. There isn't a guy alive who wouldn't baste you on the xmas dinner table in front of the entire family if you walked into the room dressed like that.

I'm going to assume you mean this (what with it being your last guess) when you talk about 'already nailing it'

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Originally Posted by manker

I'll summarise:
You're a decent kind of a chap who had a thing for a chick who posts here but got hurt and that exacerbated your general disillusionment with humans - and you like to fuck around with hyperbole on the internets.

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But that went wrong inside the first seven words, I am not a decent chap, I might once have been, but I'm not anymore. I've been saying that for months now, so I'd have thought you might have got it by now.
I never 'had a thing' for any 'chick' who posts here, in fact I can state in truth that I've never known any chick who posts here.
I did have what I was deceived into believing was a friendship with a woman who reads this board, but it turned out she was a lying maniplulative piece of trash, who was never my friend, as she proved beyond any shadow of a doubt, so yes she did exacerbate my disillusion with humans.

So it looks like you haven't nailed fuck all.

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Originally Posted by manker

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Originally Posted by Squeamous

Wow, my confidence has plummetted to an all-time low. Not only am I now worried I'm bad in bed, but I'm now worried that you think I'm bad in bed. The fact that you've slipped a sexual advance in there is making me almost as eager to please as the last fat girl in the club at 2am. I'll do anything Manky, ANYTHING:wub::naughty:

Spoiler: Show

NOT!

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Damn your spoiler. Damn it to hell.
I was so sure my (completely altruistic) plan would work - and then you splayed its inner workings for all to see, like some kind of frog in a lab.

You know, you're kinda funny for a girl. Maybe you could try and tell some jokes about aids or jews. Guys like that kinda thing :idunno:
Failing that, do the Jeri Ryan Santa outfit. There isn't a guy alive who wouldn't baste you on the xmas dinner table in front of the entire family if you walked into the room dressed like that.

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I think this is your opportunity to dress up as Jean Luc and say "make it so"

:naughty:

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Originally Posted by Squeamous

Usually when I have sexy times with a man he wants to do it again. In this case, the plaintiff, who we shall refer to only as 'R' insists that although he would like to spend more time with me sex is by no means a foregone conclusion. I think it is. Obviously I could just rape him like I normally do, but I would really like to try consensual sex for once in my life. Since the feted occasion of our coupling I have been trying to show an interest in his shit and sending him Youtube clips of the Borg and Dominion wars (Star Trek franchise) in an attempt to inflame his ardour. To be honest I'm almost out of ideas. We have arranged a Star Trek DVD fest at his place over the Xmas period. Would it be too much to turn up as Jeri Ryan in a Santa outfit? Obviously I want to avoid this sort of thing happening:



:eyebrows:

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Without necessarily being overly specific what did you do to him the first time round? :unsure:

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Originally Posted by R

So it looks like you haven't nailed fuck all.

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smh

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Originally Posted by Biggles

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Originally Posted by manker

Damn your spoiler. Damn it to hell.
I was so sure my (completely altruistic) plan would work - and then you splayed its inner workings for all to see, like some kind of frog in a lab.

You know, you're kinda funny for a girl. Maybe you could try and tell some jokes about aids or jews. Guys like that kinda thing :idunno:
Failing that, do the Jeri Ryan Santa outfit. There isn't a guy alive who wouldn't baste you on the xmas dinner table in front of the entire family if you walked into the room dressed like that.

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I think this is your opportunity to dress up as Jean Luc and say "make it so"

:naughty:

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I'd go the whole hog; shave my head and dress in a leotard for the faintest glimmer of hint of a chance for that kind of RP action :naughty:

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Originally Posted by manker

smh

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Nope, there's no hate either.

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Originally Posted by rejectOfAllah

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Originally Posted by manker

smh

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Nope, there's no hate either.

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Shaking my head.
I just can't ignore a double negative. It makes a Brit sound chavvy and an American sound stoopid.

You'll notice that people who have learned English as a second language never commit this foul crime.
It's because they have a better grasp on grammar, like, innit.

I read it as "so much hate".

So what is there to shake your head about?

And your opinion of my grammar is supposed to mean what to me?

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Originally Posted by rejectOfAllah

I read it as "so much hate".
Yeah, I got that :eyebrows:

So what is there to shake your head about?
The double negative. Was I unclear.

And your opinion of my grammar is supposed to mean what to me?
My post was about me. Me. ME. What my opinion means to you is your own prerogative.

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..

Ooo has the penny finally dropped?

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Originally Posted by rejectOfAllah

Ooo has the penny finally dropped?

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I've always known that what a person makes of a proffered opinion is up to them.
I think most people know this.

In fact, I'd go so far as to say it's blindingly obvious.

I can only suggest you shouldn't state your proffered opinions are fact by making statements about how you've nailed something, it's fairly easy to cause offence by making such statements. As you've done here.

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Originally Posted by rejectOfAllah

I can only suggest you shouldn't state your proffered opinions are fact by making statements about how you've nailed something,
Even if you use pertinent words, you still have to put them in the correct order, young man.

it's fairly easy to cause offence by making such statements.
On the contrary, it's virtually impossible - unless you're talking to a pooflord.

As you've done here.
bwahahaha

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..

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Originally Posted by rejectOfAllah

I can only suggest you shouldn't state your proffered opinions are fact by making statements about how you've nailed something,
Even if you use pertinent words, you still have to put them in the correct order, young man.
The order of my words is eactly what I want it to be, and clearly conveys what I'm saying, thanks.

it's fairly easy to cause offence by making such statements.
On the contrary, it's virtually impossible - unless you're talking to a pooflord.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll add that to the list.

As you've done here.
bwahahaha
And that speaks volumes about you.

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..

Quote:

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Originally Posted by rejectOfAllah

Quote:

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Originally Posted by rejectOfAllah

I can only suggest you shouldn't state your proffered opinions are fact by making statements about how you've nailed something,
Even if you use pertinent words, you still have to put them in the correct order, young man.
The order of my words is eactly what I want it to be, and clearly conveys what I'm saying, thanks.
Pretty colors

it's fairly easy to cause offence by making such statements.
On the contrary, it's virtually impossible - unless you're talking to a pooflord.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll add that to the list.
Pretty colors

As you've done here.
bwahahaha
And that speaks volumes about you.
Pretty colors

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..

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The lounge clearly needs more gay.

Honestly. What is this 'taking offence' that I hear so much of. Is it a real thing or a made up politically correct way to respond when, for example, someone says that a lot of Africans have aids.
I've never had occasion, ever, to be offended.
The whole concept seems effete. You can imagine someone clutching their hands to their chest, wearing a pained expression, eyebrows knitted together while uttering in a high voice; 'I'm so offended by that'.

Sure, I've been annoyed by someone's opinion. I've been displeased or even hurt by words from the mouth of someone I give a fuck about.
But offended, no.

They either had a good reason for saying it or they're an idiot. Either way, I don't think they have a responsibility to ensure that I'll be okay with what they say before they say it because the whole concept of taking offence, especially while speaking to a wide audience, implies that an orator should bear in mind that someone within earshot may disagree with his or her words and that may cause some kind of emotional discomfort.

I would suggest that people who have previously described themselves as offended need to man the fuck up.