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Thread: Not for the conservative Christian..

  1. #1
    Really, don't read if your a god squad nut.

    After a drunken discussion with some old Chinese men, i brought up religion. The old wrinkly man suggested that it's all based on someone's perception thousands of years ago, and you either need to adopt that perception, or don't. Bright words from a senile old git reeking of vodka. He said for religion to work, perception needs to change. As in his eyes, every fable has 2 very different perceived themes. His example is as follows:

    "Take the whole virgin Mary situation. What if, using what i know of man and woman,i told you that this angelic wife married to this working class guy who worked long hours away got pregnant, couldn't explain it to her husband, admitted an affair, out of shame they moved away and made up some mental star and men-with-gifts story.

    So gullable/bored/desperate are people to believe in something or someone to lead then out of the crap, this story spreads round Bethlehem. Several people suggest they are lying. They decide to check out the story in Nazareth with some traders they buy ice off. Alas, all people from Nazareth were slaughtered by Herod. This confirms to the already believers that "Virgin"Mary and the child must have been saved from Herod by some magical spirit. Others here on the grapevine that actually Herod is the father, and killed all in the town he feared were hiding Mary and killed all the children out of jealousy.

    Or these three wise men were actually well-off middle eastern traders, sent by the Sultan she'd been shagging to pay her off with expensive crap.

    Now...i don't agree with that statement. But, if it's true, that means Christianity is based on all it isn't supposed to be, Mary caused mass-slaughter and higher pensionable age. Herod, a man seen as the devil, fathered Jesus. Joseph was a jaffa. The bible is straight out of Readers Housewives.

    Also, if Joseph was a carpenter, why didn't he build themselves a portable shed? Maybe even their own manger? Why didn't God introduce Josepth and Noah in a dream and make the whole ark building thing a little easier?

    Just a thought.

  2. The Drawing Room   -   #2
    bigboab's Avatar Poster BT Rep: +1
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    Too long drawn out to be a sales pitch, so we will stick with;

    No in at the womb followed by no womb at the inn.
    The best way to keep a secret:- Tell everyone not to tell anyone.

  3. The Drawing Room   -   #3
    i guess she had a womb. I'm calling her a slut, not a transgender. Thar would be blasphomy or something.

    unless Jesus was a robot. Or jedi.

  4. The Drawing Room   -   #4
    j2k4's Avatar en(un)lightened
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    Quote Originally Posted by jimbo12345 View Post
    i guess she had a womb. I'm calling her a slut, not a transgender. Thar would be blasphomy or something.

    unless Jesus was a robot. Or jedi.
    Quite right.

    I suggest you clean up the wrinkled, senile, vodka-soaked wretch, firm up your scenario, start a religion, and make a fortune.

    It's been done before.

    BTW-

    If he made so much sense to you, why do you describe him as senile?

    Do you suppose others might reach the same conclusion?
    “Think about how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of 'em are stupider than that.” -George Carlin

  5. The Drawing Room   -   #5
    Biggles's Avatar Looking for loopholes
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    Any scholarly investigation into the roots of Christianity will show that the version we have now evolved over several centuries and was only firmed up and codified during Constantines rule - perhaps proving Seneca's point that ordinary people find religion to be true, wise men find it false and rulers find it useful.

    I think we could all, given a jar or two, come up with a less scholarly hypothesis - possibly involving aliens and magical glasses
    Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum


  6. The Drawing Room   -   #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Biggles View Post
    \
    I think we could all, given a jar or two, come up with a less scholarly hypothesis - possibly involving aliens and magical glasses

    And we can all believe in the holy spirit and his 2 friends without alcohol. They could be pixies/aliens also. At least alcohol is the reason for thinking that. Whats a christians reasoning? Other than the "belief" bullcrap.

  7. The Drawing Room   -   #7
    Is this an anti-religion thread?

    Can I play?

  8. The Drawing Room   -   #8

    Heart

    Quote Originally Posted by j2k4 View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by jimbo12345 View Post
    i guess she had a womb. I'm calling her a slut, not a transgender. Thar would be blasphomy or something.

    unless Jesus was a robot. Or jedi.
    Quite right.

    I suggest you clean up the wrinkled, senile, vodka-soaked wretch, firm up your scenario, start a religion, and make a fortune.

    It's been done before.

    BTW-

    If he made so much sense to you, why do you describe him as senile?

    Do you suppose others might reach the same conclusion?

    Apologies, when i say senile, i was just settting the scene. Storytelling, if you will. He probably wasn't senile. Also, he was drinking baijiu, a rice-based spirit, 22-75% proof.

    As for my own religion, i'll consider this. China's desperate for a figure head. I could be the new Ghandi (with shoes). Fancy joining J2k4? Youcould be a disciple. No cruxifiction or other nasty shit like that. And virgins for all!

    All other wannabe worshipers, send me a PM, and let filesharingtalk.com be our Mount Siani....You'll never take our freedom!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Ava Estelle View Post
    Is this an anti-religion thread?

    Can I play?

    Sorry, converts only. If your not a worshipper, you are not coming in. Unless your a virgin...then we'll be needing you...
    Last edited by jimbo12345; 03-12-2007 at 10:33 AM. Reason: Automerged Doublepost

  9. The Drawing Room   -   #9
    Biggles's Avatar Looking for loopholes
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    Quote Originally Posted by jimbo12345 View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Biggles View Post
    \
    I think we could all, given a jar or two, come up with a less scholarly hypothesis - possibly involving aliens and magical glasses

    And we can all believe in the holy spirit and his 2 friends without alcohol. They could be pixies/aliens also. At least alcohol is the reason for thinking that. Whats a christians reasoning? Other than the "belief" bullcrap.
    While I can see that one could argue that belief/faith is something of a take it or leave sort of argument in favour of any religion I think equally one might say that "belief bullcrap" lacks the Socratean dialectic touch with regards debate
    Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum


  10. The Drawing Room   -   #10
    Quote Originally Posted by Biggles View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by jimbo12345 View Post


    And we can all believe in the holy spirit and his 2 friends without alcohol. They could be pixies/aliens also. At least alcohol is the reason for thinking that. Whats a christians reasoning? Other than the "belief" bullcrap.
    While I can see that one could argue that belief/faith is something of a take it or leave sort of argument in favour of any religion I think equally one might say that "belief bullcrap" lacks the Socratean dialectic touch with regards debate

    The word "belief" has been used as a weak answer and shield for too many things. To the point of blind stupidity. "That poisonous snake may bite you" "No it won't, i believe in God." What they really mean is "i'm brainwashed/scared/don't know". Either one, not a good promotion of religion.

    It's like someone saying "HI, what's your name?", and you answer 'yes". It's non-sensical.

    Granted, religion brings relief. Kinda like having an invisible friend with you. The thing is, if you admit to having an invisble buddy for too long, you'd be given medication and labeled mental.

    Don't get me started on the whole Mohammed falicy. What? So you want me to believe not in the bastard child, but in someone i can't even see a picture of? So no evidence he even existed, ever. I mean, come on, every religion needs a icon to focus their mutterings towards. Good for marketing purposes also. Think of all the merchandise you've missed out on. A better business plan was needed. If it was nowadays, HSBC would have laughed at you and we'd all be wearing Bhuddha slippers.

    and the "belief bullcrap" remark was me just "keeping it street". I'm well-educated and i don't smell.

    And Biggles, why bring Socrates into this? Should the world listen to philosophers from a country who's main export has become kebab vendors? And that's the educated ones.

    And Socrates probably never existed. None of his work exists, his ideas were only passed on by his "pupils" (Plato and such). Kinda like god. Made up. As a focus point.

    And living by your principles, as Socrates apparetly did, is one thing. Dying because of them is another . Man needs to adapt to environment, or die. He is not a good example.
    Last edited by jimbo12345; 03-12-2007 at 12:26 PM. Reason: Automerged Doublepost

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